How to recognize manipulation
Manipulation is an indirect method to obtain the desired, manipulators get their way, acting on the area of discomfort, imperceptibly. Namely: causing a feeling of guilt, fear, shame. Since childhood, this fixation goes through a person’s entire life.
Why the manipulator can not say about their desires directly and chooses the indirect method? Because he is not ready to take responsibility for what he needs. Man is not ready to «poor» for someone to be bad and so on, and through manipulation he obtains what remains «clean» because he didn’t ask for it all made itself, and its manipulation is very difficult to translate literally.
For example, a professional uses manipulation also marketers. Why serve information about the advertised product in a perverted way? Because, most likely, they represented a fair product nobody will buy it because there is no need.
Most people are often faced with the manipulation, but does not even notice this subtle deception. Below will be described examples of manipulation, ways of its detection and prevention tips manipulations.
A friend who constantly gives, compulsive helps in little things, a ride somewhere, one word is always there. What is she doing? She holds «on the hook» to at one point to confuse their (often inappropriate or not in time) request that you do not want or do not have time for this or for some other reason, but to deny uncomfortable – she’s always helping, always there. Have to comply with her request in spite of himself.
The manipulator in the company
This method of manipulation is very like to use men. When it comes to any company to gain recognition and attract everyone’s attention, the man quickly reads who needed what and what someone needs, it promises them, thus, buying attention for the evening. Most likely, he lied to them and anyone can not help, but the main goal it achieved – he’s in the spotlight.
Mothers and wives also frequently manipulated. A woman is physically weaker and is looking for any more elegant effect. Most often they resort to the most primitive and outright manipulations that evoke a sense of guilt. For example, when the wife says goes to the football to her husband that the children he will be missed, she urgently needs his help and so on. Thus she tries to leave her husband at home, calling it guilt.
Messages with double meaning
Very interesting way of manipulation – a double message, where words with emotions.
The words mom, for example, can be: «don’t come, son, don’t.» In this compassionate tone, with rising lump in my throat. That is, the words she is saying that it does not come by emotions and asks to come.
Such manipulation is often used to obtain the sympathy of any partner, psychologists call it «Love pendulum». It is manifested by constant change of emotions to the partner, the person acting, then approaching her, then moving away. At that time a person feels? During the approach to him, he feels loved, and during the separation from him that it does not like and reject. Here the game on fear that it is no longer needed. Many people call it flirting, but in fact is a blatant and primitive love manipulation.
Marketing, religion, markets, beggars, etc.
In this case, the person affected from all sides, when possible, plus the manipulation on feelings of guilt, shame and fear. For example, a beggar passes by the person, affecting his visual perception, a person becomes sorry for him and gives him alms. What pays this man? For your comfort, it therefore bribes from guilty feelings.
In order not to fall under the influence of the manipulator, it is time to discover yourself. Listen to your feelings, emotions and desires. It is important to remember the three main feelings are evoked by the manipulator guilt, fear and shame.
And the best way to combat this effect is to make manipulation phrase is relevant. For example, to ask the manipulator, noting what he wants. Then he will have to take responsibility for their desire. The need to clarify the situation once and for all rid themselves from manipulative influences of others.