What to do to feel again the taste of life
Good day, dear editors.
I write to you not for the first time, but until then, not received any response from you.
Recently, I began to behave somehow cynical and aggressive attitude to others and to girls. And it scares me a little. But about all under the order.
In relationships with girls I don’t know why, but began to behave like an asshole. Perhaps this is affected by the divorce. Maybe something else — I couldn’t handle it. Not only that, when I’m with a girl I try not to notice her love and pleasant attempts to spend time with me, so I still for some reason trying to show her all her errors and mistakes and generally reduce everything either to quarrel or to. And most importantly, when the girl is happy — I got more and more darker. I Wake up in a terrible negative. I’m ready to scream at the sun, it shines brightly. To yell at her that she walks slowly, and she, in turn, will make excuses like I’m tired or my feet hurt — but I do give a damn. But when she becomes sadder and sadder, and maybe even cry — and then something in me begins to rejoice. Such joy on my face is the envy of even a child with free ice cream. I’m glowing with happiness…
In bed everything changed too. If before, I liked to move, to change positions and help the partner to achieve orgasm — now it’s all done on the machine. Not a drop of enjoyment. It’s just necessary. That’s all. To feel something nice I need to get a girl almost by force. Grab her by the throat, and strangled a little, to enter it. If so, I will take pleasure in. And this is the only option I can do after sex to be relaxed and kind.
Work… Ugh… Working in the service industry, I was just sendin ‘ people to hell. Because these stupid things coming to the store, you can not decide why they are going. And it’s just annoying. At first I held back, but then I couldn’t, and began to honestly tell people what I think of as a particular brand, and about themselves. Petty creation, come into the store to yell at sellers, to show how they have a big purse, or just to see how the stele in front of them other people in trying to please them. Which in fact is not surprising — people don’t like the truth. And soon I was asked to leave on their own.
In the community, too, as it’s all changed. If I loved my friends and enjoyed his time with them — now I don’t want to see no friends, no family, no anybody. I even took up sports, which was abandoned. But seeing that it haunts me — and threw it. Hobby, book, nothing now, no joy…
Maybe it’s burnout? Or this is growing up… Although I am only 28. I do not understand what I do to feel again the taste of life and start again to be happy?
Hello, dear depressed asshole (your words). Apologies for not reply sooner, you know, a lot of questions, besides, I try to make the questions different and was different. We can’t one hundred fifth time to answer the question of how to find their place in the world, or how to behave with the woman that changed, we still journal, not a private medical practice. We are very sad when our readers problems, but I want to others was also interesting.
And that’s what I wanted to say immediately. Hope you don’t think us vain talkers and hypocrites, so we wrote about that 30 years is a youth, this age which does not oblige you to have a family and be a millionaire. But it is sad that in 28 years you can’t understand their cockroaches on their own, and seek help. Moral maturity and responsibility is somehow supposed to emerge. Why was your ass in this fecal hole.If Gypsy took your hand to tell fortunes, they would have said something like: «the road Waiting for you a short, short. I see a lot of evil, waiting for you the story of crimson, purple and clerk. Faeces strewn your path, a lot of troubles in your way. Will kill you, you will prove to everyone. And because a lot of stupid things». The inability to solve their problems, which are superimposed on one another, and fell upon your fragile shoulders after one critical situation — divorce. Divorce — it is dreary, even if we consider it as liberation, but in your case, it only exacerbated your problems, not only with girls. And anyway, it only confirms all my theories about your problems. Sorry, of course, but in 28 years to write, and many times personal (I stress personal) topic journal is somehow childish and disrespectful to yourself.
All very logical, divorce oppression, which caused a powerful explosion that cellar under all the good that was in you. Your infantile head suddenly began to realize that things in your life all wrong and all wrong, here come the reassessment of values, an attempt to somehow cast a sad present. The brain tries to understand what actually happened, and how to find the way out. Simply put, your life at a particular moment is a combination of resentment, frustration and disappointment, you’re on the verge of a great depression (or rather, she already came), if you do not begin to solve the problem. A way to solve it is only one to start life with a clean slate. It’s not the taste of life, you should try to recognize, and again to start it. Your emptiness caused by the loss of the meaning of life, you are in the mode of existence, and all you need is to understand their inner devils.
You need to look in each section of their failures, and consider what it is eating you up. Maybe your girlfriend is wrong for you or your work — not what you dreamed of, but with friends you’re just bored. Try to find the grain and solve the problem. Renounce anything that is dragging you down and leads to negative thoughts, sleeping things, which can make sadness (unless, of course it is not the people, they can not smoke). Maybe we’ll take a vacation, and during the week to try to live a different life, maybe even a better one.And most importantly — to determine the desires and aspirations and begin to achieve them. But it needs a little work on my thinking and behavior, taking more seriously. Your activities should reflect the aim, try to do it.
And in that moment, when the existence regain their sense, you will feel again the taste of life it wait not make.
We didn’t want to embarrass you, we just wanted to help. Tough, Yes? It’s more convincing. Good luck, most importantly, do not lose yourself in yourself.
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