What is most memorable to April 2015

That passed, as if stung in the ass, wild horse, next month. Flying is fun, in preparation for the seventieth anniversary of the great Victory, rhythmically rocking booty, convincing others that under Putin began to live better. And he was the long-awaited media plan. After all, we waited for April to do some what to play and what to see. However, everything in order.

1. Mr President


It was the month of Putin. Putin is Mao, Putin is power! Mr Putin answered all questions and made a gesture – gave the trainer the girl with cerebral palsy. Although worthless to the country where disabled people beg for necessary things. Anyway, sad a straight line out: no fun question like, «Vyatka» kvas and hateful comments, they say, when at rest. But Mr Putin was held, as always, perfect. And coughing less than last time, which can not but rejoice.

And then, a film dedicated to 15-anniversary in power. In fact – the tour entitled «Putin raised Russia from its knees.» To some this will seem a revival of the cult of personality, but in fact life has become better, life has become merrier. And the quality of the film let the judge documentary. As such, not impressed.

2. Toys


In April finally done something so long awaited by the millions. The computer industry has shot a doublet, hitting the head with the release of Mortal Combat X and breaking with delight the hearts of fans long-awaited release of GTA V on the PC. As a result, millions of fans performance has dropped sharply, thousands of nurse was summoned to the school because their children parodied the new Raiden fatality, millions were left without work because they are too overworked, and millions of girls once again were free. In short, a masterpiece has turned out, to hell with it!

But if the developers of Mortal Combat had it right: said on April 14, released 14 April, Rockstar seemed to have never let the coveted «five» computers. Despite the considerable weight of the game, that it came out almost two years ago, and half had time to play with friends on consoles, millions of people around the world… waiting for the raps to safely download it. Without registration and SMS.

3. Game of thrones


The long-awaited fifth season was not so welcome. Rather, all traditionally stick to TV screens, with a voltage of watching years of him. Although voltage is not the same, and the agitation subsided, and the interest is less, and less and less by hand indignantly exclaims: «What?! You’re not looking?!» People languished, broke glass like chocolate in my hand, and turned into kononenkoae, for which each new series was a dose. And it would seem that nothing has changed. Hard sex as he was, and is, the heroes constantly rolling out of the frying pan into the fire, people are dying like flies. But nothing radically new.

The season promises to be interesting. Don’t want to spoil, but it is expected very, very unexpected turn and a pleasant meeting with old friends. Intrigued? It is the same. The show didn’t become worse. He’s just a little tired of his ofigennoeru. Moreover, the year between seasons – a very big change in our rapid age.

4. Wrong bees

The once peaceful Orenburg became the epicenter neosexual scandal. On the stage of a recreation center «Youth» (this is a very important element) Schoolgirls showed his amazing performing skills twerking. Who knows, twerking call now fashionable idiocy, when the girls lined up in a row, and hiding her face, rhythmically twist the priests. And then they wonder why guys treat them like whores.

So, given that dancers were not 18 years old, wise guardians of morality saw it as «humiliation of Schoolgirls». But we know that the investigative Committee and the best friend of all Russian children, the Commissioner for the rights of the child in the Russian Federation Pavel Astakhov, just didn’t like how perverted over their beloved children’s tale.

Indeed, for many of the «adventures of Pooh» is a Handbook, source of inspiration and quotes, so no need to let the classics «through the ass».

The stage Director Frank dance, faces charges under article «indecent assault without violence a person under eighteen years of age, in respect of a person under sixteen years of age.» She claims that the movie leaked without their knowledge, but too late to drink «Borjomi». The fact that here has not done without the idiocy, because some saw orange and black «bee» costumes connection with St. George ribbons ahead of Victory Day.

5. Anniversary euphoria

On the eve of the great Victory, as a rule, observed deterioration of all mental disorders for negoatiate. Believe me, there are adequate of the patriots, there are those who, together with some servants of the people makes human memory of a fucking circus. Well, they too can understand: spring exacerbation.

For example, from bookstores abruptly disappeared in the comic «Maus». Why? Because that’s where the cover shows Nazi symbols. It may seem that this is correct! But there is one thing: a comic book dedicated to the victims of concentration camps. Mice – Jews, cats – Nazis. Here’s a caricature of the horrors of war. And the squid there for the entourage, not for the sake of propaganda. But if it is – down from the shelves! I don’t care what the comic talks about why Nazism is bad, don’t care if he has won the Pulitzer prize, who cares that some countries are seriously considering the question about the introduction of it into the curriculum. The content pales in cover.

It’s one thing when forced to remove the ribbons from bottles of vodka and other heresies. It really is cretinism, even from a commercial point of view. Even the child understood that a single penny from the sale of the Jaguar will not go to help the veterans.

Another thing is to blame the perversion of the… dancers. Another twerk-a scandal broke out around the girls in the background of the memorial «Malaya Zemlya» in Novorossiysk. Despite the fact that the monument was God knows where from the epicenter of the dance, the authorities decided to curry favor, and now the virgins threatened by a very real term for hooliganism.

Opinions were equally divided. Some argue that it is wrong to turn his back on a place where every inch is covered with blood, while others demand the release of the girls. Now the power of the new Russia threaten to check out all the dance schools of the city-hero.

I have the feeling that the government has decided to declare war on twerking and expression in General. Although from the fact that banned twerking, no good. But to deprive girls of freedom stupid and pointless.

Only concern is that the servants of the people didn’t confuse the crap kilometer area near the majestic memorial. Nobody knows what offends the memory of the dead more: dancing or mountains of garbage, over the place of graves.

6. Eat at home


The story of the brothers Mikhalkov-Konchalovsky aroused someone’s interest, someone’s irritation, but we didn’t see that someone has supported this initiative. As a rule, were heard shouting that Nikita is a little… stunned. We have a serious issue, and we cannot resort to direct quotations. Just ask the billions to create a network of traditional fast food, which was supposed to oust MacDonald’s and similar with the Russian market, at least, very strange. Given that we have so quite a few networking «traditional» fast food, which so far plays all over Western competitors.

Maybe talented Directors to create a brilliant menu, any «Siberian-barbershop whopper», or «tired pie». However, when all corners of the trumpeting about the dangers of fast food, it is not better to spend our taxes on something that is not going to kill us?

7. Jared The Joker


«You know how I got these scars? Nowhere, they are not, I’m beautiful» – I guess I now have to say the Joker in the performance of Jared Leto. And let it look more like the illegitimate son of Sid of Vishez and Merlin Manson with dill on the head, fans of the Summer love it. But Jack Nicholson is not, as most fans of «Batman». Poor guy, first disappointment in the form of Ben Affleck for the lead role (although the editors manygoodtips.com respects Ben), and now «felasa type of Akira» look like a wretched punk. But any idea that Jared will perfectly cope with this task, and we only wish him the best of luck.

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