Want to throw it, but can’t find the cause


Good day, dear editors!

I have a very difficult (for me, at least) and painful question. Romantic plan, of course. If I don’t deliver, they can make some incorrect and illogical things.

I’m 25, my girl is 27. Together for six months. The last two months living together. The problems began recently. And I have a suspicion that this is only in my head they are such. When I tried to tell the girl – and I haven’t had one – she said that I can wind, and soothed.

The fact that her friends – guys who have no girls. Someone has an ex, someone the beginning of a relationship, fifth, tenth. But all of them are searching for something in my girlfriend: someone is looking for a meeting with her to complain about life, someone just happens to be in town, and they go to lunch together. I myself know all of them, been to one of these meetings. Besides these, there are these types – penpal. This men from other countries, there are about three with which it communicates regularly. In the beginning of our relationship, when I had my birthday in half an hour she went in the room to him with the words: «have a headache, want to sleep». I (acknowledge that it’s wrong) went in and read on Facebook why she was actually doing. And, of course, she told two different guys that she’s bored in my company and no one to talk on high themes, etc. One wrote that he’s her husband, and my friends there.

To you, my friends, make it clearer, I will say this: she plays so that she is a step ahead. If I had done, as in the case of the DR, I was wrong. She would’ve justified it so that I would have to apologize. She did not apologize – I’m just saying that all is well, trying to develop a conflict.

At the same time she always tries to help me, asked about what I care about, but in the end it all ends in a quarrel. Blame me money several times, again, did not apologize. I have a salary same as hers.

Have a lot to tell, but it will be a lot of letters. I tried to think less about this situation, but become cool, she says it to explain why its cool, I can’t as specific examples there (as well as those that I described above). Many times had thoughts to leave her and go away, but can’t find a reason (except for his strange anxiety) that I would have to leave her. I have a feeling that I run, but doing this for my benefit. In the eyes of the friend I’m henpecked. One I stated.

PS: She once said that never been in love and that I was her «love» didn’t count. At the same time, behaves the exact opposite, but rarely. Don’t know what to do. Confused. Sometimes I think she knows me better than I know myself, and read my mind.

P. P. S. Remember an important point. When her nerves, she pulls me on steam. Sometimes you may not call, if not home because «I was upset, didn’t want to pull on you».

The answer

Hey, buddy. Long did not answer your question, but what time are sorely lacking, I hope, understand us. But your problem is really painful and difficult, because it requires quick decisions, and the more pull with the outcome, the harder it will be to get out of the situation. It’s like a swamp. The result, as you can imagine, can be very frustrating. What could be worse than a breakup? Clearly, the continuation of relationships that do not bring you happiness, peace and confidence. And all this, as we thought, you don’t have. You have a lot of doubt about his girlfriend, which is reason enough for termination. Everything else, you’re not really sure about his feelings, besides, apparently, you lose control over your life and anxiety confirms this.

I rarely advise to stay the course, but in this case still dare to do it. From all this unhealthy looks, especially her tight communication with the male sex. Yes, we all love to talk about culture and life with those with whom you fuck, but the Lunches and other cute things are somehow alarming. Recently read the story of Stephen Mark Rhine, which was called «the Red wrath». Here there is very clearly shows the consequences of years of such relationships. Yes, and some experience suggests that «a one-sided game», when in any conflict is your fault, not brings you mental health. I saw a man strong enough and clever, which just nerves are gone from this life, and he’s even a beer mug could not hold in his hands because she was shaking, spilling a drink. Is this the type of men who can see the enemy only another man, not a woman, and therefore don’t know how with the latest conflict.

In General, for a start try to calm down. If you have already solved the problem, well done. If the problem was solved, «she», oblongus his position again. Do you make mountains out of molehills, or did you skillfully manipulated, gradually turning into another person? It may take a little time and you’ll be convinced that everything was normal and right that staying is your choice. But to you we wish to think clearly, to think about the relationship from different angles and to reach a coherent picture. But, of course, first of all you should think about what you want from a relationship. Don’t always need a good reason to care, just desire and lack of comfort, because a lot of friends in this world and very few of those that make us happy and support us.

So think again, try to analyze what you’re feeling, but on facts, forget it. It can shpejtesia on the side, and may be true, but it doesn’t change anything. The reason lies in the senses, and can change not only the genitalia but also the brain. Life after all is one single, and spend my time not worth it. Perhaps you expected us to another, but is an opinion formed while reading your question. We wish you to work it out with a friend or take the other track.

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