Time to be selfish
We all know that to be selfish is bad. The pure refined selfish, who puts himself at the center of the universe and believes the universe is a figment of my imagination. Like not a solipsist, but something like that. In twenty years all selfish. Age selfish. Be afraid of this period is not: survive — will become smarter if you will make from the life lesson. But I digress.
To twenty five we often don’t have any obligations such as mortgages or families. We sincerely believe in the banal postulate «no One owes nothing to» live like real jerks aren’t looking for commitment and try not to lose various opportunities. We train to be free or really hammered on this topic, because we do not know what it is. In an effort to make life better we must understand that we don’t like and stay away from that.
Whether it is invitation from friends, an opportunity that fell on us from the sky, or the obligations are things that we think should be implemented just because «it should be done». This is the wrong reason for the action. Have a duty and obligation, but if you do not depend on job or relationships, and to do this I do not want, it makes no sense to do. There are so many things that society wants us to perform. And often it happens so slyly that we don’t realize that dancing to the tune of others, and do not fully understand this. When it becomes a habit, there is quite a complex question: «What can I do to not break?» The more we allow others to dictate us what to do, the more likely we are to Wake up with a sense of dissatisfaction. After all, things could be different.
It is important to be a good friend, and, of course, sometimes we must do things we don’t want (especially when it comes to work). But there are some situations when it is perfectly valid to be selfish and just say «no.» Here they are.
1. No desire to go anywhere, but I beg
Tormented by a hangover after last night? No money? You have a regime that does not allow you to eat three throat? Parents call you for dinner, but you do not want to because there will be a WHOLE family at once? Forget it! Do not want — do not. The violence on themselves in terms of «fun» vacation with your family or friends — the last thing. In all seriousness coercion. Mother strictly said to you: «Son, the whole family together! You’re really going to hurt us if we don’t show up!» In fact, you wouldn’t hurt anyone, the family should understand if she is a real family, of course.
If friends, they especially need to understand. If you talk with someone frankly tired of it, and that’s fine, there’s nothing wrong to stay home and do a little hermit.
2. Not to be friends with an ex
Remain friends is often in order not to feel guilt, to be «the right people» not to seem so pathetic. Friendship is not always the best ending of a relationship, sometimes it is much easier to be honest with ourselves and stop to chat. Sometimes it happens by itself, and hell, that’s the best you can come up with. Sometimes it’s cool to be selfish, send it off and say, «you Know, honey, if you can’t fuck, the fuck are you?»
We already wrote about the fact that we must learn to forgive, but to forgive is correct. Most often we forgive too… altruistic. We forgive the person and continue to communicate with him, although it is not necessary to do it. If you know for sure that the person did something REALLY bad, why continue to communicate with them? You can do as a real selfish and score on this unworthy chela, who acted like the last scum.
If you feel that he or she needs to apologize, then just say so. This will alleviate the situation.
4. When people ask you, you get married or have kids in the future
You can say that in the near future definitely not. The most common answer you get: «you say That now!» No matter what you say, it can change or remain unchanged. To each his own. Somebody’s happy to be fruitful, and someone in life you want something else. Unfortunately, our society forces us to live by their rules, especially when it comes to production in light of another portion of the people. At least you have a chance to really do what you want. While nobody is forced.
The reality is that some people should not get married because they are not designed for this. Regardless of gender. Maternal instinct, if he exists, owns not every girl. And it is quite a normal thing. But the problem is that no one is interested in someone else’s opinion, necessary to give birth, everyone! Why not be selfish?
5. Hanging out with friends that you don’t need
As I already wrote about the unnecessary people? If the friendship with this man does not give you anything, and just blatantly assumes you have mental strength, what do you even want? Yes, I understand that sometimes the company of people notable for us only for the simple reason that they were familiar with for many years. But sometimes even the most questionable «friendship» can last a very long time, assuring us that it is real, although it is not so. Time to be selfish and abandon those people who we don’t need. It will be easier. Of course, someone can tell you what you’re doing, like a dick, but this is just an attempt to manipulate you.
6. To move to the dream and to deal with the matter, which many people consider useless
Often, someone decides for us, what do we do in this life. Sometimes it happens so subtly and cleverly that we think we made a good logical decision, which by pure chance was the opinion of a person living nearby.
In my childhood I saw a lot of children in the sections on karate, who sincerely did not want to pursue the case. Were those that loved sports, adored awkward to strike each other and continued to work after many, many years. I’m a big opponent when children are forced to do something. At a very early age they almost don’t understand anything and take everything at your desire, that’s why for me this is acceptable. But when absolutely adequate and healthy enough boys and girls parents against their will to give to the dance section or a music school, in the classroom they have aversion. Perhaps the fact that my peers don’t read so much, blame those endless essays on the topic «- VS the Link» and blah blah blah. In adulthood, the parents force us to get a profession, that we don’t like, but we don’t want to disappoint them, we want them to be proud of us, and said, «And the younger is a fool, what to take with him? Left the second year of medical school and went to study to be an artist!»
She is selfish for choosing your own way to have no shame.