The Long-Awaited «The Force Awakens»

The people who put on avatars pop memes pop players and pop celebrities in one voice shouting that they are tired of the hysteria around the «Star wars». As they say, do not like – skip. As we write, there is no need and bright minds that will appreciate it.

We know that you’re going to freak out if you see a spoiler, because sign that you’re warned about them.

I, ________________________, I will not resent that in the article there are a couple of little spoilers.

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We are confident that most have already seen, and a different majority is not even going.

And now a few facts about the new adventures of the elusive cosmic dancers.

Overall impression

While watching the trailer, it may seem that the movie is even worse the new album Bloodhound, Gang. Actually he’s not that bad, and while watching it is difficult to break away or doze off. Not without flaws, of course, there are moments that seem completely superfluous, but in General good – 7.5 out of 10. In fact, this part is worthy to be in the top three best episodes. Well, four for sure.


In the old episodes still existed some sense of the fairy tale. In the last Lukasovsky it was gone, we saw a serious drama. Here a sense of the fairy tale returned, and this is manifested in the excessive virtues of the heroes. Even Solo agrees to help not for profit, and answers some of the characters cloying and entirely on the strange desire to «do good».

The atmosphere

The atmosphere is completely preserved. Thank you, that did not remove the great music of John Williams.


It’s kind of a hodgepodge of the last 4 episodes. There are a lot of surprises, for example, the landscape, the Death Star, increased in size and inserted into the earth (landscapes of these planets, desert, earth eternal and woodland, recognize anything?), sudden power detection and spontaneous duel between hope all cadista and hope the dark side, again the West in the bar, and again dies the most experienced and the most respected character, and again found a relationship between the evil and the good characters. But bear in mind, this film is not getting worse.

The essence of the film

The entire movie is shot exclusively in accordance with the concept of Disney is to release one film per year. All 2 and a half hours and made only in order to interest you, and tighten to the cinema again, especially the final scene. Just like the first part crushed «the Hobbit.» But I must say that it is the creators. J. J. Abrams is a good Director, and the actors played well, even Adam Driver. Probably still pick Ren is an idiot.

Good old friends

Of course, most wanted to look at the good old actors from past sagas. Was predskolaci meet with old friends from his youth. In fact, it was ambiguous.

The action of the seventh episode place thirty years after the adventures in the sixth episode. All the former actors are incredibly old. Even Chewie. The coat is thinned and not shiny. Now he certainly does not advertise hairspray.

Han Solo has turned gray and wrinkles had grown even stronger than in the last «Indiana Jones». Fortunately, he kept the charm and healthy cynicism. In fact, they are chewy responsible for the humor and irony in the picture. By the way, Chewie has become even more irony, arrogant like all these years, hung out with the adorable prostitutes in the brothels of Mos Eisley and at least five times saved Solo from a drug overdose.

But the wife, or rather ex… Oops, spoiler! Well, okay. Lei now goes with the title «General», looks like your least favorite teacher, and even with hair like Tymoshenko’s, and her face is so unnaturally disgusted that the question «why her?» occurs immediately after the shock of what he saw. Years of cocaine addiction (and, in her confession, the most acute phase of dependence was, in years of shooting the old episodes of the Saga) were not in vain.

Luke Skywalker looks like that would be better if he continued to voice cartoon about Batman and did not appear in the frame. It appears exactly at the moment, and looking for his forever sad-amazed face, painfully thirsty. It looks more like some biblical Apostle, than Jedi.

What a mug

Well, if someone faces want to drink, it’s on the faces of the villain pick Wren. Adam Driver like a good guy, but with that face earlier art did not take. And plays wishy-washy. Although the developers, the main hope of the Sith, which so easily slupia and nearly killed with the sword girl, for the first time this sword holds. This despite the fact that Kyle calmly stops in the air laser shots and still accept to be in the company of the ashes of his malevolent family member known Tetriskaro rider. And yet at every opportunity he throws a tantrum, slashing with the sword all that is possible, and generally has a very unstable mentality and a great desire to be like Lord Vader. Even Tsvetaeva so not psyched. If you look at it come to mind the immortal lines: «wearing a helmet you’re Darth Vader, without a helmet … RT».

I love it

The main female character of the Saga call for some reason ray. Played by Daisy Ridley. Very nice lady, well played and pleasing to the eye. Especially fun to watch her expression at the time of the alarm.

Sadly to see that she gets it the first time, even the «miracles on bends». And you even the car normally can’t drive.

Funny black man from the trailer

Funny black man from the trailer is Finn. And he, surprisingly, not annoying, good character, however, when he tries to be a serious character, he looks more ridiculous than ewoks. And Finn is friends with a fighter like Mithun Chakraborty.


R2D2 in English sounds like «arturito» – just like the name cherry beer. In the film, he, of course, appears, but the image has entered the stage of senile «old bucket», and therefore voluntarily goes into «sleep mode». The role of a cute and fun character performs droid BB-8 is one of the main findings of the film. He’s even cuter ewoks and jokes better than Putin during the live broadcasts.

C3PO – where the same without disco-robots. Earlier, the fool, and still possesses features of the Director-fag. Although day after day, looking at how aging Lei… He is quite well preserved.

Normal guys

Chewie and Han once again showed that they are the only normal guys in this story. Even despite the fact that throughout the film the face of Ford saying to us: «I paid so much dough! Just like old times.» But with BB-8, the three of them pleasing to most, and once again I remind that in all this rag-tag they are the only appropriate individuals who know how to properly and accurately shoot.


No one cut off his hand. The episode without a cut-off hand – anyway that day no idiotic comment. Anyway, in the episode a little dismemberment, blood and outright meat. Any monster, except for Kirk.

As always

Resistance to sad. Resistance is a terrible and helpless. It is strange that after the total destruction of several planets at once, they continue to resist. Only here for what? Why? They destroyed the Empire, you saw the ewoks in the 6th part of it is not just singing. It turns out, lost everything again. What they are fighting for, even if 30 years from now half of the galaxy is fighting on the side of evil? Emerging question, but is it a bad Empire that during war destroys its rivals?

And what of the Jedi?

The Jedi have shown to be ineffective. It has been 30 years, and no normal Jedi Luke never raised. Moreover, for 30 years, they once again turned into a fairy tale. The sister is a Princess with servants forbade them to mention, «in a distant galaxy» with the memory of all the bad, bad news spread. In General, Solo was right when he said that lightsabers – the ancient, useless weapons. Sith, too, there is their heirs – First Order, and they also have problems with the staff.

And the ewoks?

No ewoks.

Dark force

In a word, becomes once again clear why the world is crazy for «the Dark force». It is stylish, attractive and adequately described than a mystical order who fights for God knows what.

Sword fights

Any normal sword. Is «sabre dance» of the two Amateurs, but you want something epic, in the style of Obi-WAN.

Iodine does not want to see

There is no feeling of lack of intergalactic Grandfather Shchukar. It’s probably age. Before and Han Solo didn’t seem so cool.

But Lucas…

Many of you probably will feel like they are watching some other story in the scenery of «STAR». Sometimes it seems that Abrams was too cautious and therefore rivet monotonous moments vulgar pause. Adrenaline moments are few and very predictable. Like, like the epic Saga, and got sweaty and Niger «to be continued…» is Not enough Lukasovsky courage, experience, and approach. Although not for everyone, and many people love it.

The moment

The very sad moment that is not a spoiler just lazy and don’t want to believe really happened. Perhaps, the producers realized that to call the next part of one of the most popular and respected actors too expensive.

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