The belief that ruin relationships
Let’s say you have «gone mad» and feel ready for a serious relationship. But all your attempts fail miserably, though, it would seem that no terrible feil does not occur. Perhaps it is not in the nature of yours or hers), and not that the stars from day to day are growing worse and worse for you. Probably the problem is you. Rather, in your head.
There are a number of beliefs that settled in your mind that prevent you from building a serious relationship, although you yourself don’t even understand the severity of the harm caused by them.
1. Do you think that for your happiness it is responsible
The only person who is responsible for how happy you are is you. Blind faith of another person — looks, maybe magically, but only at first. The feeling of happiness, mental comfort and other fetishes of humanity that comes from within, from your head, and do not arise by some external influences. If things looked different, probably, medicine has learned to «implant the happiness.» Count on that someone will come into your life and put things in order, and then at the same time to clean up in your head is stupid and childish.
Expecting such from their current relationship, you actually put them on the cross. If you yourself can’t and don’t want to make yourself happy, no girl with this task can not cope.
2. Do you think that relations should not be a problem
No and never. Because you love each other. Bullshit!
Happiness, love, destroys the human personality, and because of the inevitable clash of personalities, beliefs, views on life. Precisely because of the existence of such contradictions you have not died of boredom in their relationship, thanks to them you are developing, you are reviewing their positions on certain issues and so on.
3. Do you think that if you once disappointed, you will never be able to trust people
Telling himself the kind, you most likely do not be able to build a truly intimate relationship. Rather, you «can’t, you don’t want to. You’re scared to death of the repetition, so don’t let anyone near them. But what if I tell you that everyone is different and that the possibilities of the Universe are not exhausted in one man cheated you? Perhaps now is the time to let go of their paranoia and trust her.
4. Do you think that keeping secrets from a partner is a violation of trust
Nothing of the sort. She has a right to personal space, something that was and will be only it. You have that same right. For long-term relationships the presence of such boundaries is necessary, their loss contributes to the destruction of you as two individuals, giving birth to two-headed monster.
5. Do you think that the work/friends important relationships
Adhering to this point of view, you risk to Wake up one day married to a stranger. As soon as the level of hormonal activity decrease, you realize that all this time was in a serious relationship with a perfect stranger to you. Where I watched your eyes, except for my Boobs? Most likely, you thought the relationship and so formed, but the money didn’t earn. In short, you didn’t pay enough attention to either her or, more importantly, you two, for which he received now full.