School bullying: what lessons can we learn from her for adult life?

By.s.ua_13.02.2014_e0LxMHTNIDYlWNow is the time to remember my school years. Hell, I won’t say that my school years were great. They were pretty boring and quiet. We guys moved up in the school yard, the girls were Smoking at the shooting range, English teacher suffered from a lack of male attention, and the headmistress didn’t care. I have rarely been the object of persecution. Poison, as a rule, not only the omega and slaughtered the females, poison all. If you did some crap, there is a huge chance to get into disgrace at the class leaders. I had it only twice in my life, but it ends up simply and quickly: a conversation at the shooting range is small and inconvenient school fight. Boys this is somehow easier. Here girls, these rosy-cheeked nyashek, everything is much stricter. Came in clothes, similar to the one in which he declared the main female class? Get a well-deserved, from the perspective of the alpha female, the strike in the form of aftershocks, stupid comments, jokes, and other troubles. If you don’t remember bullying at school, it means lucky, but that doesn’t mean that it never happened. Here who-who, and the students are true primates with about the same order. So when, during a fashion show «the School» ladies shouted: «I have this at school!» — it was very funny. The series itself, of course, so-so, but the problem with such a selective memory, most likely, is that we remember only the good. Well, or actively support the idea of authoritarian thinking, where are all the people automatically divided into two types: subject (he is a trembling creature) and Dominator (power).

But with any bullying, you can make important life lesson. Or even a few. We already decently old, but time to learn from experience. What’s the experience if anything to remove him from the will not work?

1. You can’t predict when you will become someone else’s joke and something to talk about and why

Even cool and awesome dudes suddenly could become the object of persecution. To predict it is impossible especially if you sincerely try not to be a laughingstock, then they will laugh at you because of excessive severity. Some of the kids were, of course, really strange. Wore his father’s sweater, weird glasses, and walked along the wall, anxiously revolved. These have always caused a smile because no one likes when worn next to some strange hell. And the reason is always the same: no one wants to understand the intricacies of the human soul. So always just hang up on the person the label of «Fool» and think about him a lot of weird, supposedly true stories. Do you think that it is enough not to be weird and try to be like everyone else, but it also does not work, because some people can see strangeness everywhere.

It is impossible to predict when you will become an object of ridicule, and the most important: for what? People tend to take offense, students tend to be offended twice. In some ways, the school is a good preparation for life. Poison and athletes, and very beautiful poison girls, poison and cunning and natural born leaders. As happens in life because some people endure learned the hierarchy of the herd instinct and sustain the persecution with them into adulthood. That’s where the silly gossip? Out. The best advice in this situation is to understand that most people can’t. It seems they behave normally, but still prone to this kind of ways of interacting with the world.

2. There is no struggle between good and evil

Good and evil often means «good» or «bad» for the individual. In childhood, instilled by the cartoons about «Spider-Man», we are confident that there is good and evil. This belief is actively supporting religion. But if you take the noble book of Nietzsche’s «Genealogy of morality», it becomes clear how far-fetched these two concepts. When you constantly mocks the bully, the feeling that he is the universal evil. In the end, it does no harm, right?

Actually, the reasons for bullying hundreds and thousands. These same thugs can have their executioners who are actively poisoning them. Or they believe that such behavior is in order. In any case, it teaches us one simple thing: there are no bad people, there are damaged people, too, can persecute and humiliate. They have their own ideas about right, you have your own. In school, for example, I realized that the main alpha female so for one simple reason: it has the same kind of mother, who believed that walking on the bones — a normal thing. Let only daughter is getting married, and everything will be alright.

Snot-nosed kid who pushed your ass in high school are probably not by nature angry. He just a stupid kid who does stupid things that seem right to him.

3. Watching the bullying is much worse than the bullies

It takes a special mind to quiet, even with a nasty smile watching as chmoryat some unfortunate. Normal people don’t look at this shit. I’m not talking about to step in, it’s dangerous, could be as miserable in the future, because no one your generosity is not appreciated. Persecution in some way part of the animal nature. The more one pushes their inner hairy monkey in a cage, the farther it gets from bullying and hierarchy, but still a very prone to this. The same evolutionary biologists and psychologists believe that baiting can kill interference from outside or the voluntary intervention of the whole «pack», where it seems that everything is wrong. The offender remains in the minority and understand that here such orders cannot be installed. But the problem is that nobody wants to intervene.

Witnesses often just afraid that falls under the distribution. They feel that on the social ladder are below someone who is trying to assert itself. But every so often they side with the bully just to get a bit emotional experiences and to join the glory of the leader. From this simple example you understand that most people do not want for anyone to protect, they are passive and even aggressive.

4. If you survive all this and is angry with the world, you become a fucking man

I know quite a few people who in childhood were bullied by their classmates. You guys made the right lesson from the situation and entered into adult life without rose-colored glasses that are usually securely mounted in the head to those who rarely chmorili. Also they have this stupid school cynicism and hierarchical thinking that has got people that he supports persecution. However, the former moremuch, in fact, far less than others.

The effects of bullying do not pass without a trace, adding us complexes, all sorts of problems and other troubles. Even those who have successfully passed the period of persecution, they remain somewhere on the outskirts of the soul. But this corridor school shit, provided, of course, if you’re going to come up, will make you more free, intelligent and kind person. If you have not made the right conclusions from the school of life, is long overdue.

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