Parents and children: as parents stifle our creativity

manygoodtips.com_28.03.2014_z3aAGUhkEVXWOThe status of the parents at all times, was unquestioned. To women could be treated as the second grade, but that the mother was treated much better. The parents were also such a halo of sanctity. In short, any slight criticism of parents always led to violent hatred. Like you said nothing bad, and people already thought up, angry to hurt, and hated.

Parents can not love. It is a fact of life. It is generally understood that love she comes and sometimes it must be earned, but it ever appears. But really, it’s not. Parents can do not to love you. This is a very unpleasant truth. Love can not appear as if you have not tried. But the article is not about the love of parents, and about the so-called «parental protest.»

It is no secret that parents at some point will want to give your child, for example, in gymnastics or ballet. Sometimes even a boy. You can be against it, but your opinion is not even asked. You may want to go to a hockey game, painting or karate, but my mom always dreamed of having a son on the big stage, and pays for your life, so she calls the shots. But it is a bit exaggerated the situation. Sometimes the parents of such behavior we want happiness, they make the mistake of many people who consider themselves altruists, they do not ask what we want, thereby making violence against the person and hiding any artistic aspirations, desires. Often, parents believe that the child is stupid and knows nothing about life, so the choice should be made for him to 18. So a simple reception parents wean a child to do something independently, to make their own decisions and understand what he wants from life. In addition, they forget that if a person wants to do karate, but not to play the guitar, the latter is unlikely to go well for him. But there is also the worst thing: the parents want the child was a continuation of themselves, such a «second attempt», and the child is obliged to do all the things that they do not have time to do it yourself. So it is difficult for parents to understand that their child is a completely different person, absolutely, and he may be others. Don’t forget about the authoritarian mindset that makes some people assume that children all owe them.

«Parents protest» — the uncompromising «NO» a whole generation of moms and dads who, with all the best intentions (or not), simply and easily refuse us to make our own mistakes. First to their own interests, and then in his own career. You want to be a programmer, want to go to the art faculty, I want to play music or engage in some specific cases. Mom grabs his head, dad frowns: they wanted you to become an economist, lawyer, and anything that brings money. You say, «Mom, programming makes money! If I go for industrial design, I can earn a lot of money for a comfortable existence! And I want to do something more interesting!» But my mom starts to say that all this immature desire programming you don’t have brains because in eighth grade you had a C in geometry. Dad pulls up and says that you can’t run a technical College, and the painting is crap some is not for the man is, there’ll be one to sit among girls. You say you’re gonna pull that this is your dream, mother grabs for his heart, the father condescending looks at you, and you… you seem. So, you’re not faint of heart. It’s just the attitude of parents, attitude of the sublime and the habit to trust their opinion. You learn a fucking economist or even someone become a merchandiser, auditor, estimate or consider more than dabble. And drawing and writing programs become for you a hobby that gradually because of shortage of time out of your life forever. However, it so happens that you learn, giving parents a debt, and then go to work by calling. That Miyazaki did.

Remember his two comrades, who do not communicate. Dudes parents literally forced to go to doctors. One of them complained to me as he got sick of all these pressures and how he hates histology and other medical science. With parents these two are awfully shit, I even found one scene with the broken monitor. It was very embarrassing. From the third year both a friend left. The fact that dudes since childhood, fond of repairing things, computers, programming and were techies to the core. The van, which is older than the other two years had gone before, managed to learn to work and mount servers and Cisco routers, began to earn good money and fuck up. Second took time off, studied and went to work to van in two years, and then completely gone. Some of them kind of bought a big apartment and recently married.

From the moment of our birth until the day we leave our parents ‘ nest, figures of moms and dads have always guided us. They avoided our protests or lovingly, or condescending, or aggressive. Very few parents are sincerely understands that their idea of happiness can make someone’s life miserable. In addition, they absolutely do not understand what jammed our banal desire to comprehend something new and earn experience. Even the Bible story of the prodigal son teaches us that we should allow our children to make mistakes and take them back without reproach.

If a person has creative potential, if he really something is and doesn’t want to thump and roll in front of the TV, and something to do, why discourage him this desire to put a spoke in the wheel? So, it is extremely rare when children drop everything and go their own way, not paying attention to the wish of the ancestors, because they want to earn their love, surely you can get children to do what you think is right. But honestly, we have enough lemmings, inexperienced physicians and any office workers who can easily replace computer programs in five years. Why do we need yet another release of people with unfulfilled ambitions? Allow children to make their own mistakes and choose their future career on their own.

When children are denied their aspirations, there must be a logical reason why they can’t do that. Most often it is reflected in the fact that parents do not fully understand that they are their desires, and the child will still not intelligent and independent, although he finished school. Then we complain that people are not as independent went. Not surprising if you do not give them to take important life decisions on their own, they will not be independent.

Simpson senior the article is not accidental. Was one such series, which reveals why he became so amorphous as is now. When Homer was fond of sport, was not the last man, all he did, and he of his life to associate with this case. That’s just his dad’s son didn’t believe it, all his interests were called nonsense, and their main event in his life didn’t come at all. However, Homer presented it to the nursing home and treats him with no love.