More trash, waste and sodomy

When «free artists», after the next of lysergic parish, go into politics, does this mean Gennady Zyuganov, because their campaign is much more interesting.

The Mayor Spider

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Warning!!!

The following opus is replete with the words «trash, waste, for example.» Why? Because. Watch the video below, and all will understand.

Sergey «Taschemta, for example, trash, waste and sodomy» Trinity, known worldwide as «Spiderman», waking up after one hell of trash, waste and sodomy suddenly realized that we needed to raise Russia from its knees, to cast out Satan and other monsters from hell and to give the people fashionable parties. It all started tragic for the Universe the time when guru hard rock purchased land in the suburbs and called it «Village Parkovka». Since started pens about what guided the Hard Rock Corporation to recover the virgin, and the Spider in all the interviews bragging about their (quote) «one of the most popular and trendiest chickens villages», taschemta for example. And yet, carbon monoxide imagines himself a crisis Manager, who offered all to move to the countryside to breed pigs, chickens and steal from the Crimean winery Portanova barrels, leave them to brew to make high-quality whiskey, for example.

Back in the 90s ran for mayor of Moscow. One of the main, if not only, point of his election program was a proposal to sell abroad the Christmas tree, but to share the money equally. However, then it was banter for the sake of PR. Now the convictions entered in the terminal stage. In an apocalyptic 2012, the Spider swung at the seat of the mayor of the glorious city of Khimki and was throwing a re-election wagon, from which even the famous genius of propaganda Maestro Joseph Goebbels had an attack of hysteria excitable. In the election campaign Sergey promised to turn Khimki in Las Vegas, and officials to teach to dance ballet and rap. No dictatorship was not as ruthless as «Hard Rock Corporation», governed by a Spider. The gist of it was clear as a tear Komsomolskaya Pravda: to take on a huge catapult to send all of them back to Paradise and to throw trash, waste and sodomy, using dal’s trendiest Crimean wines.

However, inhabitants of Khimki did not understand what happiness they can get, and refused to give the Spider throne.

Then the spider turned its gaze on the city of Zhukovsky, beating with its 2.5% of many. 23 Jan 2014 Spider announced his candidacy for the post fashionable the wildest of the mayor of Novosibirsk, for example. The local election Commission arrived at the fashionable white limo. As always, the spider was elegant, eloquent, graceful and surrounded by trendy Geremi.

Maestro promised, for example, to move the capital of the country novosib, washed down spider-swastika on the emblem of the city and add to the trash, and fashionable Crimean wine and intoxication, and sodomy in the everyday life of residents of the capital city. The next day was arrested for a brawl at the airport. Suddenly the genius of sodomy withdrew his candidacy. As excuses blamed some «taxi mafia» stole «all the loot that is allocated to the campaign. But 15 already again decided to participate in the electoral race. The reason, as it turned out, was simple as a stick: «dark forces», he wanted to stop fashion, for example, to the candidate.

To the credit of the Spider, he deeply studied the electorate. According to him, will vote for him «those who took power already». In his campaign he taschemta proposes the establishment of a chocks-migrant workers labor military units and give them a curfew and also to colonize Mars and to prohibit pop. As you know, this is the most sober proposals in Russian politics in recent years. In the end, the Spider failed taschemta to snatch the honorary seventh place (1.07% of votes). Did not happen on the streets of Novosibirsk the holidays.

Now the Spider is generated by communication with the leaders of the DNI, trying to make his DNI, with vodka and trendiest Geremi. This time the happiness has dropped like bird shit on the heads of residents of the city of Vidnoye. So-so. Sergey has already submitted documents. According to Spider, Vidnoe Republic is destined to become part of Russia, to expel all evil creatures and make a trash and waste of vodka and the ritual burning of effigies Abamki Nigger. If this Utopia where there is no pop, chocks, envy and adequacy where there is the spirit of cheerfulness and Holy «taschemta, for example,» when you are on the map, I first buy a ticket.

The party of moderate progress within the law

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The absurd genius of Jaroslav Hasek was an extremely talented man: in addition to mental illness, alcoholism and talent for writing, he showed himself as a politician who knows exactly what you need to the electorate. If you read «adventures of gallant soldier Schweik», you’ll understand everything about what the author thought. In 1911, the Czech Republic was named in honor of the famous company produces tableware – Bohemia (just kidding, Vice versa). The peculiarity of the country that it was a multinational province of Austria-Hungary and the Magyars and the «Austrians» had no problem with a good beer. Hasek in the shower was a revolutionary and a patriot, and so to share the beer with different Slovenes and Bosniaks he didn’t want. Restless nature and a mental disorder didn’t allow him to participate in traditional political struggle of the existing parties, so there was little choice: either settle down and join has a weight party, or with noise and fun to create your. As you can see, Hasek chooses the latter and together with friends creates a «Party of moderate progress within the law». The name serious, charismatic leader – such a Zhirinovsky with a little of the Czech Republic. In General, the reasons not to run in the Austrian Parliament, and in 1911, a party led by Hasek started active election campaign, which took place in a truly haskovska style. A meeting of the party held at a local restaurant «Kravin».

Hasek knew what the people want, knew very well, but the party was created for the sake of laughter. Such serious things Hasek openly despised, and so he was surrounded by a halo of absurdity. Why are only the slogans: «If you elect our candidate, promise that will protect you from the earthquake in Mexico!» The meeting was held under beer and consisted of performances that Hasek played with friends. And in his campaign speeches, making fun of itself existing political life, he used a vengeance anecdotal stories like those that will be constantly used later Svejk. Finished his speech Hasek usually words like: «Citizens! Vote for the Party of moderate progress within the law, which guarantees you everything you want: beer, vodka, sausage, and bread!» Like I said, Hasek knew that people need.

Competitors, by the way, deep down, shared the opinions of Hasek and often came to a theatrical promotion. Just for shits and giggles. The police reacted to the party is more serious (that’s right, remember one regular at the Munich beer), and therefore exiled to the meeting his agent, purely for hedging. However, weak mind could not stand the absurd things happening around and mishandled Cossack instantly split, showing the helplessness of the Austrian police. Realizing that none of them will testify against Hasek, «escaped» the fact that bought to present 50 Beers. The Commissioner of police, not believing «pregenome» the agent went to another meeting myself, and then took a little vacation, and at the next meeting sent two of his enemies and also police officers. As we can see, the benefits from the party Hasek was still. As a result, one of these police officers dopilsya to such an extent that started shouting that the police employ some bureaucrats, scoundrels and scammers, which once again proves that the higher the rank, the smaller the brain. The scandal was hushed up by sending a census of the police to the resort as «pereutomlyaemost at work.» What a beautiful job, I will tell you, is to sacrifice the liver for the safety of the country.

The election itself, the company gave idiots, alcoholics and parasites of Austria-Hungary the belief in a bright future. And I would have voted, see:

– introduction of slavery;

– rehabilitation of animals;

– introduction of the Inquisition;

– mandatory introduction of alcohol and other paragraphs in the same style.

The electoral process itself Hasek just ignored it though and told me that he was voted thirty-eight people. A pity, the world would be a drunker and more fun.

Well, if joking, in the biography of Hasek policy occupies a very large section. Incidentally, the great writer, took an active part in strikes and sowing right and left the ideas of Bolshevism.

PI-Orridge

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Once effeminate genius of the industrial Genesis of PI-Orridge was going to run for mayor of London from all informal hangouts. It was all very grown-up: active funding from the porn videocompany and manufacturers of various pharmaceutical remedies, which liked to obdumyvaetsya representatives of the London underground; the melancholy musician David Tibet personally helped him to compile the program. Tons of substances, strange beliefs and the desire to make fun of the society, wrote the following sentences:

1. The cancellation of sex and species identification imposed by society. Thus, each can consciously choose your gender and appearance depending on the inclinations and attitude. Who wants to be a monkey, then he becomes a monkey. Who wants to be a half man-owl – please. The main thing is to not hurt other citizens of the city and did not prevent their activity. In short, everything that is happening in a tolerant Netherlands.

2. Nobody will be administratively and politically motivated to interfere in the work of the media. It will be free to the extent that that will be willing voters. Importantly, the presenters wore beautiful things. Unfortunately, over the years TV has not become better.

3. All skyscrapers of the city will be repainted in blue, and instead of glass insert beautiful things.

4. Cancel pop (Spider continues this Holy mission).

5. Undoing the past, present and future. Time in London was supposed to be infinity, in which all will live and die.

6. The decriminalization of drugs and the creation of a wonderful profession – pharmacist-at-home.

7. The abolition of the concept of truth as a fundamental installing of a person’s life.

8. Ban teachers, mentors as a kind of human behavior.

9. Forgotten now, Nina Hagen as a symbol of the city.

10. Oh, and best of all – the abolition of the rains.

Was done even a few photo shoots where PI-Orridge was presented in the form of Hitler. The slogans were: «don’t vote for us – vote for reality! The city of the future here and now, the future is in your brain, not the hands. Turn your life into the trip forever!»

However, the case never came – all for a momentary quarrel friends. The fact that PI-Orridge liked to steal the pants of Tibet, which was very annoying last. One day, a few hours before the concert of Tibet Genesis was gone, along with pants. Tibet was very nervous, because the pants betrayed him confidence on stage. In the end, one hour before performances Orridge put terribly stoned before clear eyes of his best friend and saying, «Here are your jeans, honey, and remember: up to 12 hours, you’re Cinderella, and after a 12-year – slut!» was awarded the decoration of the owner.

Soothing Tibet, without looking, dressed in your favorite pants and spent the entire concert, never noticing that the part of the jeans, which covered ass, it was written in some kind of white liquid: «Tibet – Christian saradnici». After a while they reconciled, but to politics, to put it mildly, cool. A pity, because the ideas were incredibly sober and relevant. In short, the liberal democratic party with even more of the absurd and clowning. Postmodernism is a postmodernism.