Man said — man made: how to make a decision
The ability to make decisions is a very important aspect of masculinity. No soldier wants to be under the command of an officer who is in an emergency situation, grabs his head and begins to run in a circle. No woman wants a husband who can’t decide whether he wants a relationship. No boss does not appreciate the worker who is unable to make decisions quickly. Nobody respects the guy who is first going to grab a Burger, and then half the night wishes she chose him instead of wings.
Dude women love that grows service, which honors all the world’s strong dude. A decisive man is calm and keeps face, even if he’s pushed. He has a goal, he goes in a certain direction, and he always has a plan. Indecisive people progressing slowly and slightly, because he always so vague and he cannot understand, something to strive for. He is stuck in a neutral position, neither here nor there, while the strong man is already committed to your goal, your happiness.
The man who is always very decided, constantly concerned. He goes on about the opinion that the decisions made allows him to stay longer in security. However, he does not understand that to live is to swim in the middle of a mountain river, where we are constantly trying to withstand the events engulfing us. If you stop paddling, you just submit to the flow and float down it. You can’t just be to stand still. It’s impossible. Instead of keeping everything under control, you start to feel like life controls you, making you that event. If you’re trying to live, not taking decisions, these are unfulfilled election will be subconsciously present in your mind, you’re going to regret worry about them.
It is impossible for life to just go with the flow. A real man directs his life where he needs. He is the captain of his fate.
Of course, just to make decisions is not enough. In the end, the man constantly makes bad, wrong and just stupid decisions, will not succeed. You should be able to do it: make the right decisions at the right time.
How to make the right decision
All of Us daily have to make decisions. Some are simple: what shirt to wear, what to have for Breakfast; some are harder: for example, the choice of University or company, which want to work. When we need to make an important decision, we often delay it as far as possible, supposedly to think. We know that once we enter one door, another immediately closes, and we’ll never know what was waiting for us there. It scares us. But there is a way to ease the torment of choice and start to make better decisions.
Gather as much information as possible. When you had to make an important decision, this is the first step that should be done. Do not just sit and wonder day by day, waiting for the stars then do the rest and will give you the answer. But try to find as information about between what you choose. If you are trying to choose a University, read about all the options, go there, talk to students, etc. If you need to choose a job, get as much information as possible about potential employers, talk to colleagues and other workers in the industry. And why do you need Google, in the end? And finally the moment will come when everything will become crystal clear for you. If not, you move on to the next step.
Make a list of all the «pros» and «cons». It is reliable and tested method which is sometimes very good. Just take a sheet of paper, raschetti column and sign all the «pros» and «cons» of each possible solutions. Ideally, in the single solution must significantly outweigh the pros of other options. If it’s not so obvious, the process of understanding all the positive and negative aspects may bring the moment of enlightenment.
Imagine how you’d take each of the possible solutions. Sometimes when we make choices, we see the results of this choice only in the abstract. But it’s your life. So sit down or even lie down in some quiet place and really try to imagine your life after the adoption of each of the possible solutions. Think about what you will do and how you feel. Which scenario seems to you the most peaceful and calm? Thinking about what scenario you feel happy? And that devastates you?
Think about the earlier decision. It is often said that people who do not understand history are doomed to repeat it. The same is true for the world and for individuals. Sometimes we again and again make the wrong choice.
Think about the bad decisions you’ve made in the past — they have something in common? You have several times refused to follow my dreams to reach a high position in society? Then don’t take another decision, to amuse his pride. You took the wrong decision due to the fact that he was not sure? Now be sure in everything and not get off course.
How to make a spontaneous decision
Of course, you don’t always have time to sit and think. Sometimes decisions have to be made on the go. It’s harder because you’re under the pressure of circumstances, but help is available.
Be ready. You probably watched the football and saw how beautiful are the goals. Athletes seemed to know in advance what it will be like the feet manage. Maybe it is the coach showed the team various games with their opponents that the team had a certain strategy, they trained. So when it came time, the player is able to score a great goal.
Obviously, you can’t anticipate all the decisions that you have to take. But you can prepare as best as possible to ensure that you can expect. On the job pay close attention to the details and think through strategy. In the relationship think about what you want to achieve, think through, what are you going to answer my friend when you begin to discuss your plans or challenges. Learn invaluable skills that you need in an emergency. Train in what you need to be able to help yourself when the need arises.
Listen to your intuition. Some scientific studies have shown that intuition comes from the unconscious processes in the brain. Trust your sixth sense. If options seem like the same benefit for you, listen to your intuition.
How not to regret your decision
Of course, even the best solution can overshadow the regret. They eat us, and we can’t kick them out of my head. We made the right choice? And if not?
Regrets are usually included after a period of rest by the fact that the choice is made. Are you applying for a new job, and a few weeks there comes a point when you start to think, if you’re right. Breaking up with my girlfriend and after a week you start to miss her.
In such moments it is necessary to be a man. You should be able to close the door behind him. Here are some tips for such a case.
Look at the past. On the list of «pros» and «cons» — save them in this case. Re-read all my notes. When you start to doubt, you can look at them and remember why you took such a decision. Surely there was something important that needs to change? If not, go on your way. Remember: just because you’re hard, you don’t have to think that was wrong.
Repeat: whatever I decide that I’m right. This advice I heard from one old and wise person, when I had to be one of the most important decisions in life. And it calmed me down. No matter which path you choose — there will always be something to rejoice about than to be sorry. If you had made a different decision, the difference would be small. So just calm down and accept: you did good.