How to survive infidelity and move on
To touch such a delicate and complex matter, as treason, even as something unpleasant. You can bavallstunet to its democratic attitude to the change, saying that it is natural and not ugly, but when they find his woman in the arms of a passionate macho, then all of democracy evaporates away. And then – nothing. Anger, despair, frustration, tantrums, insults and the feeling that in parallel with your lady at the same time fuck you. Being rude, vulgar, blasphemy, cynically and against their will. Because instinctively, we perceive their sexual partners as their property, and here it is actively used. But still much more painful than if your weights lifted the other ducks. Heart is broken, and it turns out that you’re not as beautiful as he thought. You traded, left with nothing, alone with the emptiness, simultaneously Potapov flowering meadows of your mind and transferring all the happy moments that stayed there. And in the moments when you feel betrayed, like Belmondo in «the Professional», devoid of most native and dear, beginning to think that life is destroyed once and for all. It will take time before you understand that your nail is not necessary, but it is better to start to understand it much faster. To survive infidelity is very difficult, but still possible.
A little bit about the nature of the problem
This article discusses the options when reunification with the love of your life is impossible. So do not blame us in the proverbial greasy sexism. We’re just looking at one look, it is not necessary to poke us in the pool of male adultery, shouting: «why go left?» Personally we don’t go, and a reason to care. The fact of the crime is no excuse.
Definitely the most rude and begs to mind the position – to throw the prostitute. He can go to his Rustamchik. She screamed that he gave her those sensations she did not feel. So let the rolls will be pleased to see her face when she realizes what the knight took advantage of her, as they say, pomatrosil and tossed.
And then she will come to you to ask forgiveness, and you tell her in response, gates his breath: «fuck off!» The Bible, of course, taught forgiveness, but in the Pentateuch for treason the death penalty. Unable to forgive her, but only putting on the street. After all, cheating does not affect the love but a sign of its demise or lack of. Even the excuse «drunk» is no excuse. After all, that a sober mind, then drunk on language, and in this case – in other places. Relations at least intimate thing and do not provide for public use, otherwise it is not a partner, and the toilet of some kind. Besides cheating deprives any confidence, and if Madame and impudent, then there is no need to even think.
The worst thing is the doubt that will be stronger than you, if you leave it as is. If the partner does nothing to defend himself, to correct and again to prove that betrayal is just a bug, if you have no lights up past feelings, it is better to disperse. If children the apartment and total loans predominate over the image of the cuckold and a lifetime of agony and doubt, then good luck to you. But remember: infidelity is not severity. It is measured by one value – your broken heart. So there is no difference anal or timid Blowjob. Do blowjobs to the end of his days, lousy bitch! (I hope we cheer you on, dude?)
It is clear that it is very difficult, but still… Try not to think about it. It is clear that the brain automatically begins to scroll in mind all the nuances and work in the «what a bastard I am». Occupy yourself with work, work, training, self-development, so the brain had no time to think about it.
If the plan didn’t work, I advise you to go on the reverse. In the smallest nuances, detail and biased scroll in my head the details of their relationship. If you are a normal person, then similar attraction with memory you’d be bored, and thoughts will quickly disappear.
You’re not a loser
Stop to consider themselves a loser. In such times, it may seem that life is over, until a visit to thoughts about death. Chase them away. Psychologists are strongly recommended to write your positive qualities down on paper and read daily for Breakfast, lunch, and dinner, or just to do what you’re good at. In the framework of the law, of course.
Work on yourself
After infidelity there is no scandal, which completely reveals the causes of crime. These revelations will be the basis for your future relationship. Often, as mentioned above, both are guilty of treason.
Less when «it’s all about me, I don’t love you and never loved you.» Well, there’s no love at first and start with the first point. And then make new passion and be perfect for her. Maybe you had bestial habits like corruption, total eudeline attention and rudeness, from which it is necessary to get rid of. It’s actually pleasant to not all. Take care of yourself, it’s a great distraction.
Sex, drugs, rock-n-roll
Bring back self-belief in their masculinity. For this you need to briefly plunge into the maelstrom of depravity, lust, and passionate casual relationships. Be patient and let loose the libido. Casual sex without commitment, a full alcoholic-erotic isolation and hard work with blisters on the causal place. Prostitutes and porn – it’s not the same. After all, you have to prove that you’re capable of get a girl that relates to you biased, which will not make you a discount and say «whatever you want», for the money paid. For greater effect, you can arrange a group excesses, to finally believe that you’re the king. In the end, all of a sudden your next love will be the one the only one that together with your children to discuss what will suit to bury your persona. That’s a reason to frolic, to experience all those sins and vices that they talk about in the autobiographical films rock star.
Perhaps your friends and relatives strongly resented the lack of attention. Still, it had to go on about this siboldi, to spend time with her and to keep in mind her stupid interests and wishes, in which your company was small. But now everything has changed. There is an opportunity to catch up and make contacts with old friends. Well, who will give faith in your strength, not your friend? From only one phrase: «Fuck this whore. Look, I’ll cut off her boyfriend dick and sew it to your forehead?» – becomes a little easier. Who else can say that? Dad with his brother. And mom is perhaps the only person who is able to translate the words because some bitch dared to hurt her son.
There are, of course, the caveat that the family will treat you as a person who has experienced amputation of hands, feet and cock with regret and deliberate caution. Therefore, you should behave as if nothing had happened. From this their sad faces will take the natural look, and you will feel better.
Cheating creates the pain the heart and mental. However, this pain can become not only the reason for the excessive use of alcohol and drugs, but also wrote the wise man of Stephen king in his most brilliant «Insomnia»: «the Pain is very unpleasant, but it is also a stimulus». How many books, how many songs were written under the impression of the great and unrequited love. From the sonnets of Petrarch and the «divine Comedy» of Dante to such greatest hits as «You left me» group «Arrows» immortal «Battery» and even Claptonesque «Leyla».
But let’s not get hung up on creativity, such feelings can be an impetus for any of the achievements and fruitful work, whether to execute a five-year plan in 3 years or chop wood. Use your pain for their own purposes, this is the highest art.
Life for yourself
Rejoice, boy, you finally have a reason to do something you couldn’t afford before. Because, as you say, if after cohabitation the money was more, only because you got a second job.
And now, finally, there was the chance to buy a PlayStation to grief in a gaming binge, to throw socks and go far, far away, where you’ve wanted for so long, Nepal and Georgia, but could not go because he gathered her dream – Cuba. Travel generally changes, washes all the dirt of worries and experiences like a cold shower.
Different culture, different environment, and the brain works differently, and the body feels otherwise. In the end, renewal, revival of spirit after incineration.
Running from the past
Even more radical experience to escape from himself – to go to another city. It’s all that travelling, only more radically. Elementary, but in any case not cowardly, an escape from the past. No cowardice, in desire to find themselves and live in new ways. New job, settling in, life, meeting new people and none of the muzzle of that reeking of the problems and frustrations of the city, any nasty reminders. Of life, smell the freshness of Alpine mountains, and ahead the most interesting – trying to fall in love with new people.
They say hard work expels from the memory all the evil without the rest, even the song Avraam Russo (if you remember who he is, the evil is too deeply embedded). Well what can I say Pasha, man. If the office of the wandering is clearly not enough, you have to work with his hands.
A very important tip for the future: when he woke up from the resentment, you try to create a new relationship, try to develop them in a different scenario than that lousy whore. Otherwise Hiking in the same Park, cafes, the same gifts for the first month will remind you about the sad experience and add a flame on coercion of doubt and distrust. You’ll be like senile grandfather purged, who believes that the world is a series of prostitutes and homosexuals.