How to remain faithful in marriage?
A few years ago the Governor of new York Eliot Spitzer was forced to admit that enjoyed the services of prostitutes. The story occurred in all the media, and a lot of people posted on their blogs a list of other famous men, whose moral character was far from ideal. However, the most important question was never asked: how could this happen to a man who has spent his life in the fight against corruption, which, like adultery, is essentially a hoax? Can you avoid cheating?
The case of Spitzer or uncommon. 25% of all American men (and some studies give an even higher figure) was on the side. In Russia this figure is even higher. If you remain faithful?
Many people treat infidelity as a natural disaster – no one could have foreseen, however, for unknown reasons has occurred. Perhaps the reason for infidelity is that people forget about their responsibility. You can not only watch her as adultery — you have the opportunity to prevent it.
To remain faithful in marriage. Will it be easy? No. But it is precisely those obligations that are assumed when he decided to marry his sweetheart.
That entails deception?
Before I get started on how to remain faithful in marriage, you need to first mention that is a deception. It is clear that sex with another woman is cheating. But I am of the opinion that it is possible to be wrong without going so far. Of infidelity there are lots of variations, which also should be avoided. It is possible to be emotionally unfaithful without even having physical contact with another. A great example of this — infidelity online. Many married men are romantic, sometimes sexual relationships with women at different sites created for communication. Even if men had no physical contact with these women, they still cheat on their wives. Men, communicate online with women who are cheating the trust and loyalty of the wife mentally, and this is more than enough to consider them infidels.
Now, man, let’s try to understand how to stay faithful to his wife. Here are a few ways to avoid cheating in marriage.
Make your marriage priority # 1 for myself
Successful marriages are not created in a vacuum. Strong relationships — the fruit of years of work and effort from both sides. You must desire with all his soul to save his marriage. Usually the couple over the years begin to devote more time to career, children and social Affairs than to each other. Of course, these things are important, but if you want to save your marriage is strong, first place in the list of your priorities must be your wife.
Continue to assign the wife a date
Razbaby your marriage, arranging a weekly date with my wife. You must treat this tradition seriously. Date night with my wife should not be too extravagant, however, you should work on to regularly provide them with certain novelty. Recent studies have shown that the introduction of novelty in a relationship can bring back old feelings of excitement to both parties. So invite your wife to a new restaurant, try a new hobby together or sign up for joint courses.
Forget about porn. If you watch porn, you sort of enter to your marriage, another woman with a chic shapes and exorbitant appetites. So you start to expect too much from his wife, her sexual appetites and preferences. Soon enough you will feel that the wife does not satisfy you, and your eyes will start to wander in search of a new sexual object. I repeat: forget about the existence of porn.
Focus on the romance. Any woman will tell you that being romantic is not so difficult. A romantic note or letter can be written in just a few minutes and will not take you much time. Flowers are always welcome, even if you bought them at the grocery store on the way home. These small gestures show your wife that you were thinking about her and will help you to strengthen the attachment to his wife.
Demonstrate affection. Studies show that partners who are gentle with each other, stay together forever. Make an effort and show affection to your wife. Give her a hug or surprise with a gentle kiss and always tell me how much you love her. In addition, don’t hug the wife too hard. Give her a childish innocent embrace, not turning them into a prelude to sex. These little gestures reinforce the physical connection needed relationship.
Regularly make love. Many men shy away from lovemaking because they are tired of sex with his wife. It is very easy to get into such a situation, if you have been married. Desire wakes up, usually by the end of the day, and the couple already feel tired and do not want making love. Do sex with your wife a priority. This should not lead to the development of the Kama Sutra and all sorts of hobby type toys edible underwear. Just do it regularly. Frequent sexual contacts with your wife will strengthen your emotional and physical attachment to her.
Talk to each other. Every day take time just to talk to his wife. If your family has children, to communicate with his wife after you put them to sleep. The conversation can be simple — only about what happened during the day. Discuss with her their thoughts and ideas visit your head lately. Share with her your dreams. The idea is to perceive the invisible bond between you.
Stripped of her interests. Most men who are a kind of «homeless», coming to this state for the reason that starting to do with wives less and less time. When you just started Dating, you probably did together with her. Well, at least you thought I wanted to do everything together. So you spent a lot of time doing something that brings pleasure to both of you. After marriage you have become more time to devote to work, and your wife also went to work, went into the house and the kids and now your path less traversed.
Avoid this by supporting common interests and sharing the passion with your wife. For example, my relatives from the wife’s taking a class in ballroom dancing. Every weekend they give dances. When they are at home in the evenings, they dance in the living room. My wife also came up with a hobby — joint morning run. It is important to find something that brings you both the same pleasure.
Have some honor and remember the duties. Remember: when you married, you made a sacred promise sworn to be loyal to his wife. In the past nedavnem a real man was considered to be the only one who could keep his word. Unfortunately, today the situation has changed, and not all men treat it with the utmost seriousness. Try to counteract this trend and be a man of his word. Many may disagree, saying that they should not stay married just because of the promise to love until death. But this is only their opinion, but I think the man should do everything possible to save the marriage, even if it is on the edge of the abyss.
Sit down with your wife and find out what its like in your relationships with other women, and that – no. These things will be individual for each pair, so can’t accurately give advice.
How to know if you crossed the border between friendship and something more?
There are three signs that indicate that you may have crossed the border, leading to infidelity:
1) Emotional intimacy.
You shared a lot of their feelings and thoughts to a strange woman?
2) Sexual tension.
You instinctively know when the sexual tension there is in the atmosphere. It can not give.
You close the window your e-mail, when the wife leaves? You can carefully plan your day and to share all the details of his day with his wife, as some of them will be a woman? That’s enough, you crossed the line in a friendly relationship with a woman.
If you notice any of these signs, then it’s time to reevaluate your friendship with another woman. Maybe you need a little to narrow these limits, to avoid temptation in the future.
Avoid the temptation
If you know exactly what you’re hard to control myself when talking with another woman, it is better to avoid such situations and to meet up with friends in large groups, which are able to save from sin, depriving you of privacy.
Avoid frequent conversations about your personal life. Many men start relationships when they start talking about their family problems with another woman. In such situations, they feel that the other person understands them better than his wife. They feel more connected to this woman — so, they begin to spend more time with her. This may ultimately lead to infidelity. Not always, but the risk is very high!
Avoid online Dating. A recent study shows that a huge percentage of married men who meet in a network with the foreign women, appointed online Dating.
Harder to cheat on his wife than to remain faithful
Think about the consequences. In fact, it’s much harder to cheat on your wife than stay faithful. If the husband is unfaithful to his wife, he frantically looks around, hiding phone calls and its true location. It brings a lot of trouble. Of course, preservation of loyalty to my wife requires less effort, but still spent a good deal of force do not go to any comparison with the dreadful moments after meeting another woman. The consequences are terrible, and because of the fleeting affair affected several people. Just imagine the disappointed looks of the children when you admit that you cheated on their mother, the sad looks wife, to whom you swore eternal love..
Create a fortress that can protect your marriage from attacks is not an easy task, it requires a lot: it is necessary to spend time and mental strength. But these costs are worth it. Set high standards of yourself and your marriage. Be a man and never deviate from the established norms.