How to pull yourself together and grow a pair



Hi, drugged and its readers! Are faced in life with a situation that began to put me on my knees.

Briefly. I broke up with a girl we lived for 2.5 years (2 years in a civil marriage). It was painful, and I simply ceased to be a man. Whined, cried, wound as a teen, and of course, it worsened the situation. The problem is not that I got divorced, and that I parted, showed himself a whiner. I know what girls don’t like, and I would like me, I would not live.

In General, you want to ask me just pull myself together and start living?

Briefly about yourself. Go to the gym. Quite nice. Have a job, friends, environment.

Thank you!

The answer

Hey, you’re come to the right place, because the editors which year are trying to create in their laboratories a vaccine against the male whining and cowardice — we’re allergic to all this shit, and we want to rid the world of this. Good that you sent us this call for help — you will be part of the process of the formation of masculinity.

Any psychological problems (and that it is not psychology?) for its solution requires analysis of the past — those made by you of the steps that led to the fact that you became a wuss (no offense, I know what it is). In the past lurk all the demons that step by step destroyed the beginnings of your courage. And the girl in them not to blame your inexperience provoked her anger further confrontation.

You’ve changed, because I thought that they can expose their feelings, and when found no answer, then just went crazy. But the truth is, that whatever is beautiful and understanding girl was in your bed, to trust her with his soul 100% is impossible. There should be a protection that will help you keep your head straight. This is the distance in the relationship — she just needed, but amorous guys who rush into the maelstrom of feelings, you know it only when it’s over.

You’re one of them: fall in love and think that your tears will help the cause, and she will be surprised at how you feel about it, but she’s not surprised, and shocked, what misery you are in such moments. We should not say you’re not in control of his hysteria. You know, you’re in control and you use your whining how shitty the method of manipulation. Or allow you to lose control of himself. And it’s awful, like Curtis wrote the song «She Lost Control» about you.Above we have described the root cause of your whining. If you realize it, you’ll be able to find practical and mundane ways to avoid such problems in the future. But before you start a new relationship, you’ve got to clear my head, and not only singly, but also in the company. An active social life will help to remove the psychological burden, which presses you to the ground and contorts the mind. Get out with friends on the nature, go to the exhibition, listen to an open lecture, take part in an urban race.

The gym is good. But it’s good to reset the negative energy that you have accumulated over the day and which were actively leaking before on a girl. Now you need positive energy, which will give you the opportunity to be an active member of society, to develop their horizons and spheres of interest. In relationships this is important because if you don’t do this, then you have no choice but to have sex with the girl quarrel with her over nothing. If you’re a man of many parts, there are thousands of possibilities of joint Affairs.

When you have a good dust off the corridors of his mind, it’s time to go back to introspection. You already will be easier to live, because there’s plenty of interesting things that you found during your active presence in society, but the danger of again being overwhelmed is not going to disappear, because you have to start a new relationship. Maybe you’ve already started them. If so, listen carefully: do not trust your feelings to a friend.

Otherwise, we would have said the opposite, but you’re too sensitive, so keep your distance — the grotesque is not necessary. Keep in mind a simple idea that the person with whom you sleep, is just a man, nothing more. You don’t have to give her all of himself because girls prefer not pocket guys, guys are self — sufficient, strong in mind and body that keep yourself.The less psychological distance between you and a friend, the less possibilities to control myself — can you take offense at every little thing, crying about shitty mood girls, to be, again, a wuss. But if you don’t worship and respect the person with whom you share a bed, that relationships are built on a different principle are two separate people, each of which quietly survive without the other, and so there is no reason to worry.

Now we advise you to engage in their spiritual, intellectual and physical development. Strengthen your identity through pages of books, calls or training. More talk and more time to tell itself. And relations wait. You need to rest from them, otherwise all will repeat again — we’ve been through. So become a gentleman, and there already and all questions will disappear by themselves.

Ask your question wording

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