How to pretend to listen

manygoodtips.com_6.06.2014_INJ8zVEA6a2nBEveryone knows that listening is much more useful than not to listen: it strengthens the relationship. However, sometimes the information becomes too much and treat her no physical ability, but those who are with us says, this situation is incredibly offended. So we have to pretend.

To pretend that listening is also difficult. If you’re trying. Just do not listen easily, but in this case, you don’t even pretend to be, and the interlocutor knows, that you don’t care about his history. Advanced not listening to consists of three components:

  • reaction;
  • look;
  • understanding that companion is near.

If you just won’t listen, as a result, you have to listen to more than the first. That’s why at least worth doing. So you wouldn’t hurt anyone, not to provoke a quarrel and will have the opportunity to be alone with his thoughts, when nobody suspects.

Let’s look at each skill separately.

1. Reaction

Advanced nessesarily appropriate to respond to words of the interlocutor — on time and in a proper manner. At first glance difficult to distinguish a person from listening to the pretender, but if you find time, you will notice a pattern. The answers of the person who actually does not listen, represent a cycle. Even the most experienced of nessesarely is only about eleven response options, because they don’t want to spend the time and energy to learn even more. Basic set:

  • Yeah.
  • OK.
  • Wow!
  • *The clatter of the language*.
  • Really?
  • *Laughing*.
  • M-M-M.
  • So.
  • No.
  • *Nod*.

Now you just realize exactly when to start to respond and how long to wait before requiring the next reaction. Of course, it is necessary to choose the most suitable option answer to you have spotted that you’re cunning. And not to listen. Difficult, Yes? Why, Oh why do people always have to communicate with us? Why not be quiet?

2. Look

Skilled nessesarily will always look at someone talking. Always. Moreover, he would look the person straight in the eye. For a long time. But take a closer look. Closer. See? His eyes unfocused and viren nowhere.

Why? And he ain’t listening, dammit!

The person you selfishly Express their thoughts, opinions and views, enthusiastically contemplating his inner world and is in fantasies about sex with a celebrity wife or you (if this person is a woman. Or husband. You can never be completely sure).

You can test this theory if you don’t believe in the word. Next time, when you will speak with the man and doubt he hears you, dramatically change the facial expression more alluring — or actually any opportune moment. Who listens to you for real, he expressed surprise, lose the thread and ask why you twisted. Who does not listen, he will continue to react memorized words and blinking seeing nothing with his eyes.

3. Remember that they were there

If you have successfully used the first two tips, the third is also important, although it seems formal. Restrain yourself and do not bother to get up without warning, not to take up subjects not related to the conversation, and not to leave the room. You think it’s formal, however, being lost in thought can otchebuchit is not yet. If in the midst of conversation you suddenly find to his companion that he had not heard one word of it, and at the climax you go to pour yourself a coffee, it was all in vain.

Mastering the skill of naslyshany, you free yourself from having to listen to the information noise, which has nothing to do with you. Everyone thinks you’re listening but you’re not listening. Well, not really. You pretend and think about her.