How to live together if you have different tastes
Nothing invigorates the morning as a bloody dispute about your future. It’s okay if you prefer the classic bright Wallpaper, and she’s fancy loft, making your bedroom like a den. It is normal to argue themselves hoarse, trying to come to a common decision that will satisfy her and will conform to common sense. But sometimes it goes too far, and the perfect relationship break about life, the lovers flee to the mothers, complaining that spent time trying to get along with a grumpy animal that does not have a basic understanding about what is good and beautiful.
But otherwise, if you went to order furniture in a stuffy, finished with stylish plywood office? The office where the tired advisers suggest you choose the custom the best examples of laminate and wood, made by the hands of the Aryan Japanese of Chinese descent, and she spends several hours in serious thought of what to choose. And when you suggest your variant — it is perceived in bayonets.
Yes there is furniture, different tastes can be in everything from food to lifestyle. They say that opposites attract, but in the meantime no one wants to live in uncomfortable conditions.
Divide and conquer
The most difficult option, but if two loving hearts can not and do not intend to go each other on concessions, nothing more remains. If you love each other and can’t imagine life apart, then do modeccin way — plan your activities each separately, giving each other complete freedom of choice. Typically, this option are those involved in marriage and burdened by children. Like so many things that tie, but to eat broccoli and Hiking under the trill of the tales about her bitch-friends not everyone can.
Some very good friends who decided to get married a month after Dating, in the end came to the conclusion that I forgot to study the habits of each other. It turned out that he likes black, she is white, and to combine the colors of life in one of the «grey» did not work. Then they did: divided spheres of influence in their apartment. Sleep together, the benefit that both undemanding in terms of sex. But I don’t watch movies (rarely get to find a good), as well as both work from home (two freelancers in the same apartment — it’s scary), I haven’t found anything better how to divide a big room into two parts and equip them to your liking. He must understand: people are creative and work in the room, «does not match them in spirit», for them is a real torture.
Together, they only sleep, eat and communicate. Each prepares himself (fierce vegan and stoned carnivore despise each other’s food). The circle of friends they are also different and mutual friends a little bit. But nothing they have 10 years of marriage, has produced twins and say happy.However, this output is good only when the partners are warm to each other, family love, and they trust his mate. Just a way of life and without that not like a family, and if the partners understand that there is no sense, no common interest and feelings, it is much easier to break up. Most importantly in this case — not to cross the line between family and cohabitation.
So let’s discuss in advance that you will be able to do together, and what is more comfortable alone; friends are considered to be common and to whom you will go for the celebrations separately, and so on.
The main thing is not to make a scene and try not to put your friend in the position of obedient Oriental wife. This option represents the maximum freedom.
Do not push
Actually, you’re both adults, living together, making plans, and so needs to act like an adult. What distinguishes developed man? The ability to negotiate. To compromise is not weakness, it’s normal, in the end, you might even to like it. Worse to play the tyrant and demand unquestioning obedience. You don’t have to claim, you should offer to give the person time to think over the proposal. You’re hard, or you’re in a hurry, or without the extra day home theater system, you’re going to spend the rest of your family budget can not be lived?
Through this understanding, your friend could understand that, essentially, even completely for your proposal. Just as used first to give. Or realize you’re a dead person, you do have to make concessions for the sake of a great love.
It should also be noted that many of the problems associated with the fact that we just don’t know how to say what we lack. Therefore, it is important to learn to talk to a girl. Instead of complaining, we begin to «provoke» the partner that is tired of both. In fact, we’re trying to manipulate each other, thinking of ways to get what you want, but so that the partner he guessed».
Meanwhile, just to ask, to agree on how it will be much more comfortable and easier.
Most importantly, don’t expect it always will be. Agreed once doesn’t mean it will do it always.
Balance give birth to concessions
And a little bit about you, too, should not stand in the position and to reject its proposal. Perhaps the new experience you will improve. It happens the same way: from a distance it seems bleak and meaningless, and then it turns out that this is a fascinating exercise; or you start to see so much better. It’s like Curling: it may seem that shit dermovate, but everyone who has ever tried to engage them, respond exceptionally enthusiastic speeches. So here: try to eat right and feel healthier. Or understand what the trap is, in General, interesting music.
One of the consequences of living together should be the development. If in your life there is no change — you just begin to die of boredom, like flies stuck in the window frame. Maybe that’ll teach you the normal taste: to distinguish between what is fashionable and what is not fashionable; it is reasonable to spend money that should not be. So maybe her tastes, which you thought was stupid because of its limitations and roundnose circle of friends, it can change your life for the better. Even faster than the products of the company rhillips.