How to find your calling in life yourself the question: «What do I want?» No, not even that, ask yourself the question: «What do I really want?»

It is not easy, right? To answer this question properly, we need to look at your life from the outside, without bias, with the most brutal honesty you can be capable of. There is a very high probability that my life you are, to put it mildly, not happy and not able to find its place.

Where is your life

And the reasons are hard to invent. How long have you been graduated from UNIVERSITY or College, it is all over. Time to justify lost forever. However, the labor market is very inhospitable to young people, despite their education, abilities, personal qualities. Everything else is superimposed on the quarter life crisis», when you’re just starting to get used to living in isolation from family, from friends. And slowly, with each small failure, every lonely night, you suddenly come to the question: «Where is my happiness, my calling on this planet?», – and if shorter, then: «Where is my life?»

You must admit that you are not quite satisfied with where you are right now. You thought life would be fun and easy, but it was far from the truth. Too often people drift in the ocean of life without the star guidelines, without a rudder, and maps. A lot of people thinks that everything will fall on their heads, did you discovered his talent of playing the guitar, and you suddenly became the best composer of three – and now you own the biggest music Studio in the country. Others, instead of to dream, so do blow money on the lottery, sweepstakes, horse racing, all kinds of bets. Some even better not to pay the fare on the bus, why not buy another lottery ticket.

But let’s be real: a good opportunity will knock at your door itself.

In your room you will not die Corsair and not foisting on its last legs in your hands a map to treasure. You will not be the lost heir of some African king. You’re not one hundred thousandth visitor to the Bank, which would give a large sum. You will not even bite a radioactive spider. It’s time to stop waiting for that wind themselves will put you in a better way.

Search destination

It’s time to start finding your purpose. You might think that’s easy? Said «I want this» or «want»? Unfortunately, it is not so easy, especially at this stage of life. Now we are much more at risk to cheat yourself by taking part in the pursuit of someone else’s dream than it was before. You finished school, finished College, found a job, but what to do next?

Around and then we hear different advice from well-meaning friends, relatives and even strangers. But all of them are quite harmful. There is no end to the self-proclaimed «wisdom» that is inherent in every human being that decided that to counsel.

Some people think that you need to settle down, start a family and buy a house with a patio where you will BBQ, garage, gazebo and all, as expected. Others will encourage you to experiment, travel the world or simply find a noble cause that helps people. This is all laudable and good. However, they will just call you to do what they would do.

Do this, do that – the list is endless, you know. even if you found that in the case of your friend all these tips work perfectly, it does not mean that they will work well for you. Paradise one-person – prison for another that is known by the time the hard way. You can, of course, to please her parents and do as they would like. You can even console themselves that they, because of their years, know better than you about life. But that you will fulfill someone else’s «dream», but not his.

Each person is different. Therefore it is necessary to understand yourself. What would you like? Maybe the life you lead as a Manager of staff, is now in its tenth year is exactly what you need. Maybe you want a simple the fate of a crab fisherman, in which there is no place for large cities, crowds of people, but just you, nature, and, in fact, crabs (then it’s time in the far East). Maybe all you want – it’s just become twice as smart, twice as rich and twice as strong? Or will you be glad when pay off with their student loans that compress your neck is not oiled the hinges? Noble your desires, or selfish, high or, conversely, mundane – all that doesn’t matter, the important thing is that they are yours.

What makes you happy

And before we give you a chance to say something this: «Hey, man, I just want the people I love were safe,» or «Hey, I just want to be happy,» you will immediately reply: it does not fit, don’t try to deflect. Everyone wants to be happy, everyone wants to be safe and protect their loved ones.

I need to start to choose the specifics: what makes you happy? Some amount of money? House in the mountains? Dream job? Political career? Pepperoni pizza with three cheeses? And what is the exact amount necessary for your happiness»? And which mountains should be your house?

You have to be pretty specific when it comes to creating a list of goals. Abstract goals and desires is always easier to come up with, but they are always harder to make a reality. They settle a heavy burden and just fly in the air our whole lives. But the specifics – is another matter. It’s like trying to find the treasure, having no idea where he is buried, something like: «It is on this island, well, there’s still a lot of palm trees and bananas». Specifics allows us to understand what we should do and what should we do in this segment of our lives. When you’re twenty plus, then you’re relatively lucky: you’re energetic, your brain works fine, it’s the best time to implement yourself, you have even less restriction while working full time. In General, don’t be afraid to be ambitious at that age. The pain of failure is nothing compared to the agony of missed opportunities.

So, understand? Half the way (well, maybe less).


Your goals

The next step is understanding where you are now, at what stage of the journey mired in the present. You have to understand that first and foremost you need to implement the plan. If your goal is to earn a certain amount of money, what you need for this? A second source of income? New job? Or maybe just the economy? If you want in the end of the year to go, say, to Greece, how much you have to spend money on travel, how much you need to set aside monthly should you limit yourself? If you want to get a job that will adequately paid, what skills do you need? How are you going to get to a comfortable position for you?

In General, all this preparation, analysis, study its features. You’re not going to the North pole in shorts and a Hawaiian shirt? It is necessary to exclude the possibility of error, although it can never fully be deleted.

When you have clearly envisioned your goal, and all possible difficulties on the way to it, the next step will be the establishment of course. The main problem is the lack of willpower, which will be in your way. You’re faced with this, sure. Here today are you ready to «move mountains» and tomorrow can’t do anything, procrastination, depression, or whatever? Postpone always easy, especially when you start to deal with stress, obstacles. But can not do so. If you want to progress, you have to be like terminator, scary and uncompromising machine, resistant to all external factors. Difficult days are bound to be, but you should not feel that you need to overcome.


It is advisable to set yourself a specific time frame. Learn how to schedule. It was all good for keeping yourself in good shape. You can even arrange yourself a small reward for each completed step.

Too often people are slipping into a third of the way due to the fact that they were hesitating or were going to do it all at once, perehara in the first few weeks. You have to understand that achieving dreams is more like a marathon, not a sprint. So you need to set achievable goals, fair time – the pace is always easier to build up than to start fast right away.

And then always measure your progress. You must remember what your ultimate goal is to understand how far advanced. Disappointment is a feeling weak. So, the goal can be very long, but to give up you shouldn’t.

Those of us who learned not only in school, can easily go astray at this stage. They always had a clear idea in spite of all these teenage problems, to life. That semester, but the second, for that, you get something for it – other. When you go out in the open world, you are left to yourself, and the goals can just abruptly disappear. Despite all the good that gives us such, you must still continue to track your achievements and how to organize goals, not to get lost.

The wind of change is a terrible thing for untrained people, right? But you’re prepared, so do not fall into a stupor when your plans threatens to crash on the reefs of the wild ocean. It is important to be able to configure the program in accordance with the behavior of time.

Crisis is inevitable, and many are dealing with crises in the life of a badly wrong – alcoholism is one of the bad outputs. However, you have to just imagine what sailing across the Pacific ocean that crashed on the rocks, you have two choices: drown or get out and build a new boat again to sail. Your skills have not gone away, and even if you were fired from work, you can find new. Don’t be sad. As mentioned Hank Moody, shit happens.


Use of resources

None of the epochs of the history of man had so many resources now. Now you can be anyone, learn anything, to learn anything. Of course, this takes effort, but these efforts are insignificant compared to what people faced in the past. Therefore, any of yourself to another – use them all, what has given you the scientific progress.

There are plenty of sites available to you. There is a mountain of published research on any topic, so you got exactly the skill that you need in your career. In any major city there are different clubs of enthusiasts, different teams of authors, researchers, wine connoisseurs, engineers and anything you want.

So, in my spare time to do just that: skills development, building of horizontal ties and simply training. It may take time but if done correctly, it will give you a buzz.

Fighting flaws

There is something that pulls us into the abyss. Need to get rid of it. I, for example, this «something» was fear of public speaking, and the best I could think of is to fit into your schedule as many public appearances. The result was to get rid of fear. It so happens that the fears are not weighing you down, and even the closest people. Maybe they are doing it for the right reasons. They don’t want something happened to you was injured or became disappointed in life, so please do not head in the clouds, not to stray too far from their native shores. But you have to let them know that your path is the path on your terms, not somebody else. Believe me, too much care – sometimes it’s the worst thing that can get you close. Try to limit contact with those people who openly say that you cannot or should not continue their journey.


In General, life is a journey. Regardless of whether you have lived in one place for years or visited almost every country in the world. Your goal may be, until the realization suddenly becomes not so exciting, will be more down to earth, what then? It’s time to put a new, even more exciting, challenging, and insane. Because as you might understand, it’s not about what you get and when. Essence, rather, how you want it. In the story of Hemingway «the old Man and the Sea» the main thing was not what the old Man managed to catch his fish, big Marlin, the main thing was the struggle itself and the will to win, to life. The sense of satisfaction will undoubtedly, especially if you’re broke to your dream through the fire and copper pipes. The journey is always the path to the new and unknown.

So, now back to the main question of your life: «What do you want?»

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