How to end a friendship
«The friendship strong does not break, all things», — told us in childhood. But we get older and realize that it’s bullshit. At least sometimes. Sometimes friendship ends, because it no longer makes sense to continue. Bro is not bro. You spoil each other life, your career, negatively affect each other. How to end a friendship? It’s not even a breakup with his girlfriend, but something completely incomprehensible. But you know one thing: you are fundamentally cannot be friends. Something has changed, you both are not the same, one of you pulls the other to the bottom, and no end in sight. Let’s see how to end the friendship and not ruin the reputation.
This files most often suggest stuff
In most cases, I advise dudes to behave in a fairly predictable pattern: meet in a neutral place where nothing will distract you from conversation, and to put on the table all the cards — to voice all the reasons why you can no longer be friends. So most men’s websites advises dudes to end the friendship. But have you ever seen doing this? Probably not, despite the fact that it all sounds pretty rational, but too impractical.
You need practical and actionable advice. This open conversation is not as effective as it may seem, so instead let’s look at more viable ways to end a friendship and even build them from any kind of system.
Determine for yourself the reasons
Start the process with, to call himself the particular reason why you decided to break the friendship. Let it be a conversation with yourself. Call the cause, argue it, find new arguments. You can do this. To evaluate these arguments from their position, let them know in the first place yourself. So if you have held a conversation about the reasons why you can’t be friends with him, you will be able to Express it quickly, convincingly and without attacking his friend.
Don’t initiate contact
Is this not the most important part. No matter what you do, but do not initiate contact in any way, if you have already decided to end the friendship. Don’t call, don’t write, don’t leave pictures, nothing. Invitations and challenges, create an undesirable situation, send a completely opposite message that says you want to continue communication.
Rejects his invitation
If you want to break up with a dude at work, don’t go with him for lunch, don’t go home with him — cut all contact. Same thing about other invitations: never go with him to parties and to bars, don’t explain anything, just «can’t».
So, you will probably have to skip a few events where you’d been, but not now when I want to end this unwanted friendship. Here you can donate something to send him the right message. This friendship you no longer interested.
Slow to react to their messages
If you’re going to respond, do it slowly and inert, it will show that you’re not interested in communication. Of course, there are circumstances when you can’t avoid contact, and in this case it is better to answer for yourself, showing that you are not interested. Then man will realize that he is not a priority for you, but this reaction do you expect to end the friendship.
Keep your distance
This is especially important if you are spinning in the same circle and often forced to meet. In this case, it is necessary to keep physical and emotional distance, to speak briefly and to the point, there is little to talk about themselves.
You can achieve this by answering his questions briefly, incompletely, but without being rude: why? In addition to this, it is not necessary to sit, to engage in a serious conversation, which involved this man, to spread on Frank theme. Not that I suggest to completely turn away from this guy, just pay attention to others. To stop having friends, you have to make it clear that you have nothing more in common: no emotion, no cause.
Eliminate him from your social circle
Do not detract from, in any case without humiliating the guy, make clear that you don’t want to include it in your social circle. Don’t invite him to parties and other events to which you earlier called him in the first place, and if he’s invited, don’t join in the conversation.
Limit contact with man in social networks or do not respond to his messages, or just delete it from friends if it comes to that. Do not give in to temptation and tell your mutual friends, why it happened and what his problem is: they will understand what’s what. No need to involve in your disassembly.
The end crowns the work
Yes, it’s hard for us to end the relationship with the dudes we hung out for a long time. But we must not do charity work, or just chat with them out of habit. It is true that guys often realize that can no longer communicate with someone, but ignore it and continue the friendship unnecessary.
With a former friend may experience difficulties, and even confrontation. But you’re already armed with a reasons which you can no longer be friends with him, and it’s enough for you.