Fear of being alone
It’s amazing how many people in the world are afraid to be alone. In a sense, we are all afraid.
We are afraid one day to be without a friend, without friends or without a family. We are afraid to travel without a company in unfamiliar places, because there won’t be anyone to ask for help. We are afraid to go through life without a helping hand because they are afraid of failure.
It’s natural to be afraid of loneliness. We all know the feeling, it is ever somewhere deep inside, even though we are trying to avoid this annoying fear.
This is the cause of our misery: to avoid the fear of loneliness, we endlessly communicate, including through social networks and email. Not to be lonely, we vegetate with a woman who is not that good for us, we are willing to sacrifice to have someone to trust. We eat Goodies and make purchases, to reassure himself: so we substituted love.
But here’s a secret: the solitude gives us power. Solitude and silence is nice.
The word «lonely» is associated with something sad, depressing and scary. We don’t even think it can teach us to be free, to push us to grow and to learn.
This you can learn only thanks to the severe practice. Can many years to be afraid of loneliness, and then to learn to be self-sufficient. I promise that this will be one of the best knowledge in your head.
Right now sit for a moment and not do anything. Look to yourself. Who are you? What you can do? What do you think? Upon closer inspection, you pleasing yourself?
There’s nothing to fear. You can even enjoy. Loneliness is cool.
To go through life alone
Do not afraid to face the world alone? You know that no one was prepared.
Yes, it is scary. Therefore, it is necessary to learn.
Can’t navigate in a foreign city? Start with where you live, get lost and find your way home. See the map online, and then learn to navigate the terrain. Now explore the remote areas. Travel gives you new skills. Ask the road. Learn from time time to be lost: this is normal.
Can’t pay off debt? Start with one. Learn all the necessary skills, but don’t try to master more than one at a time. Become self-sufficient. Better to learn how to confidently stand on their feet without anybody’s help than to need someone else’s support. When you are self-sufficient, trust is even more a strength than a weakness.
Don’t know how to protect themselves? Learn how to avoid dumb situations. Learn to be attentive to the environment. Learn to flee. Learn how to protect themselves, at least not to hesitate to call for help. You’ll feel more secure outside the home.
To go through life alone should be able to. This will not learn in one day. This can be compared with the suffering of a child who, for the first time, once outside his native court, could not find the way home, but then still finds.
Relationships and loneliness
If you learn to feel comfortable alone, does this mean that now you don’t need a relationship? Not really. But if you can’t be one, and the relationship sooner or later fail.
Why? Because in them you will become addicted. You’ll need the other person, not only to pay the bills and deal with everything that falls on your head, not only to feel protected, but also to feel emotionally complete. You will constantly seek attention, approval, love and desire that she calmed you down. This is all well and good, but if you need a special person, then you become dependent and addicted, you’re immersed in despair, but it is not very attractive. Who wants to build such relationship?
What really attracted to this confidence. Self-sufficiency. Power.
Learn to be alone and not worry that. Learn to independently meet all their emotional needs. Understand that you have everything in order, without someone else, who would you add to it.
What if you already have a relationship? They, too, can develop. To notice the moments when you have an addiction and need a friend for no reason, and deal with it. To meet their needs. It’s a slow process, but you can do it.
If you succeed, you both will benefit from this. You will be two full-time people who are not clutching each other with fear, before the world, and are in each other’s company, because they are from this nice and comfortable.
The joy of solitude
Loneliness may not only frighten, but also to bring joy.
You can meet alone with fireworks and fanfare. Meet with yourself. Do what you don’t need much effort: read the book, Popish, play music, dance, something to learn. Go for a walk or Hiking, discover the world around you, eliminating the need to endlessly something to repost.
Be alone and happy with myself.
You deserve it.