Big loss: don’t lose yourself in relationships

Work.com.ua_12.05.2014_zaqhCL3BJ2lm8In accordance with popular opinion, the relationship always means loss. First and foremost, the loss of self: if you lose your old self and become a new person when you get into a serious relationship. Nothing of the sort. You’re the same you know that it was before. Dating and sharing life with someone you love require of us a number of restrictions with which it is possible to accept, because with them relationships give us the obvious bonuses. However, some believe that they start, we just have to behave differently, erasing itself from the Matrix of old and try to write myself a new.

If we lose something in the relationship, it is only their own fault. In the process of working on this article, an overwhelming list, but some items had to be excluded, leaving only the most-most, and all because the person in the relationship allows themselves to lose almost everything, being sure that it is a necessary sacrifice. What we lose in the relationship, but actually are not?

1. Freedom

Let this rather vague notion of freedom appreciates each person, non-authoritarian character. To maintain a relationship, spending time together with darling woman — all right, but don’t forget about yourself. So, you still exist, you existed before, Vstrecha with this woman and will exist after. If you want to exercise, with the risk to spend less time with a friend, better play sports. The girl should understand that you need personal. If she doesn’t realize that if she wants all your time, besides working, it’s not a beneficial relationship. You need freedom and personal space and not a communal apartment.

2. Adventure

An important part of human life — the search for new thrills. All this can be called adventures. Lover of active lifestyle it is difficult to refuse from trips to other countries and cities, or from Hiking for a few days in the mountains. When passion does not share your interests, and multi-day tours to the forest for her mean a painful few days without a shower, soap and bath, this is a big minus. Well, if it leaves you on an adventure, but if she doesn’t want you forever was somewhere else and she did not agree even on a compromise short trips may have on the way?

3. Your passion

If you have a favorite thing, which you find hard to refuse, that’s fine. You can collect the miniatures, to make furniture and do a lot of things that make the heart beat faster. You don’t want to abandon it ever. But in your life it appears, which says that a grown man ought not to play with toys and engage in this nonsense. Of course, the girl doesn’t understand that this is not a toy, but a serious passion! Women!..

It’s one thing when she’s mocking your collection of troopers, calling them «starmouse», and quite another when your modest monthly hobby inevitably grow into a big scandal. You can’t give up their Hobbies, for such loss even the relationship is not a reason. A good reason to abandon the hobby of course, if you have not run out of sustenance!

4. Meeting friends

You and your guys become older, you are less common, but complete denial about these meetings cannot be considered. Men’s fraternity is an important part of the lives of men, to abandon it is to kill something ancient and mystical. Another thing — compromise. Now meeting friends should be shorter, because at home someone is waiting, worrying and warms up dinner for the second time.

5. Time alone

Unfortunately, in relationships, people become a kind of single organism with a collective mind. Sometimes the integration is successful, and the two just understand and provide desire each other, but it so happens that they have no personal time and do something personal. The impression that two died, and was born a sort of homunculus, which language does not turn to call a living organism. The person needs personal space, the ability to be alone and feel that Vasya Pupkin, and Pupkin does not Masamasa. This is vital to spend time alone to dig into my head, enjoy the peace and quiet. If a woman doesn’t give you that, this satisfaction with the relationship, you will never have.

6. Sex appeal

You’re still man enough, are you still attracted to women (if ever attracted). If you’re happy with the relationship, the attention of other members of the fairer sex would you just be flatter and not to cause a desire to change his lady. Of course, hardly any girl likes that you are constantly staring, and you, in turn, brazenly undressing women with their eyes, but a little flirting in the absence of a ladies heart leave your ego only benefit.

This paragraph also refers to the ability to look after themselves. If you entered into a serious relationship, continue to dress well and to go to the gym, these little details just will help you to feel better and gain confidence.

7. Knowledge of what is best for you

Of course, this does not mean that you have to plug your ears when she gives you advice. Your life is your own responsibility, always will be! And to decide you have to yourself. If the option that offers you your girlfriend, you are not satisfied, you do it your way. You’re a man, in the end! Want to go to a new job — after some discussion with the woman, but if you can’t stand, put it in the fame and go your way. No one will judge, unless, of course, loves. However, the relationship imposes on you a certain responsibility for the lives of others, sometimes to make a sacrifice on the altar of a common cause — an act worthy of respect. Just do not disturb all this with pseudoarthrosis.

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