Bad old mother-in-law

Question:

How to help the girl to learn to think for yourself? To do this tactfully, effectively and not to spoil relations with a potential mother-in-law.

The well-known «Mama’s boy», who do not get out from under the skirt and around waiting for approval from the outside, but hardly anyone talks about «Mama’s daughter». A sample of the relationship with the girl, but in fact it turns out that behind it all was a grown woman who literally climbs into my daughter’s life and tries to control every aspect of its activities, thereby provoking a quarrel in the couple.

After reading the question, I thought. Thought tightly and grabbed his head. It is difficult to change a person, not accustomed to think for themselves and make their own decisions. But you can try.

First you need to carefully and cortactin to bring to friend’s only one truth: when she tells mom about your problems, it turns into a fight. When she about your problems and your mom says, you do solve the problem a little blood. Based on this experience it is easy to establish the relationship between her complaints mom and your quarrels. Just do not need repentance and bloody battles! Start the conversation when a conflict does not smell — just a conversation within the banal «I want to talk about us.»

Another powerful argument for these conversations — my mother’s ignorance about the whole essence of your relationship. She’s not near you around the clock, and therefore does not know all the aspects of your relationship to each other, your problems and various nuances about which words to tell difficult, — you both just intuitively know this stuff, feel skin and not mother. So mom can not be an objective Advisor. There is a bonus: women are very attentive to all that concerns the feelings and sensations she’d find it a reasonable argument.

And finally, the finale. Take her. Take her on vacation, or just the nature — where there is no signal or where insanely expensive roaming charges. If the reason of your quarrel really is your potential mother-in-law, lack of communication with her will result for you in the idyll. Then pay attention friend, you little quarrel, when no one interferes with your business. You can even start with this stage, but it needs training, that’s why I put it in the bottom of the list.

Good luck, man!

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