About career choices and finding yourself
Glad I found your website. Rarely meet people who can give advice not only from the standpoint of «experts», but from the standpoint of friends. You rock. Will get straight to the point.
I have this problem. My parents are well-known lawyers in the city — include a large office, where I want to see. Now I stand before difficult choice — to go to law school, then to work in the family business, or wait a year, maybe two, to determine who I really want to see myself in 10 years. Now I’m absolutely distant from what my father wants, but I don’t know what I want to do. I have no special interests. How should I do, so I don’t miss my future and was happy?
Thank you for the kind words and that you joined the ranks of our readers. But let’s not pull an elephant by the balls and will start to answer your question. He deserves special attention, because this situation was almost every one of us.
The first thing you need to understand at 18 years old (you’ve only finished high school) at this age nobody can consciously understand what he wants from life. Then there are people that come to the institutions after school, most often the specialty is not working. They just go because «need», but this is a purely Russian habit. There is no «need» in the context of higher education does not exist, especially in Russia, where higher education institutions often discrediting yourself than praise.
Speaking for myself, I came right after school, changed three schools to understand that it is absolutely immature for education. I have only one friend (a lawyer, by the way), which operates on the profile that he chose for himself during his school years — the others do for a living otherwise, throwing the diplomas to hell. This does not mean that higher education has exhausted itself. But this means that higher education is necessary not all. Your father does not understand.
However, to fight with him now when you don’t know what you want to see yourself, is stupid. You’ll just ruin the relationship with my parents, whose help you will need — and will have to seek shelter and find sustenance. Paradoxically, if you want to keep more freedom and don’t want to a slave to some boss, hoping to pay for an apartment, you should follow the advice of his father. Thus you will have the year of the first course, which the easiest way to transfer to another faculty (at the theater, for example). This year you will learn «fear and loathing» of student life, will better understand themselves, realize what disciplines interest you and which are not.
This is the path of least resistance because it is unlikely that parents who want you to learn, think about what you still have time to work. Do not be afraid to lose time in vain. In Europe, for example, is considered normal will be determined with the profession to 23-24 years. By this time, young people prefer to travel, go crazy, fall in love, one word — live. When the period of «youth extremism» is, then everyone can see an adult who knows what he wants. About you now this is not to say.But if you do not want to study, especially in law school, then here is one way out — to talk, to negotiate, to learn diplomacy. You have to promise your parents that one year (max two) you enough to pick a career. One year reflection — it is not a year of idleness, and a year of active search. If you want to keep your promise, then you need to saturate your brain large amounts of information from different disciplines. You have to attend lectures, be interested in art exhibitions, work on a construction site, to go somewhere to «see the world» at least within the native region. Then you’ll have a rough idea of what you like and what not. And we can think about the profession, and we need to think not about money but about purpose. Higher education, ideally, helps personal growth and not only serves the interests of employer when he chooses between you and someone else.
What we came up with? There are two options the proper development of the events that suit you:
1) Agree with the father, and to spend a year of study at the University to «find yourself», and then, if necessary, translated.
2) Agree with the father, having agreed on all terms, and to live this year the most productive, in order, again, to «find himself».If you can’t think of anything, in both cases, stay on the faculty. Because this is the starting position, at least, will provide you a livelihood, given the influence of your relatives in this segment, and the position «I don’t know what I want» will make you homeless (some throughout life do not know what they want). Even if you go for the latest script of life, then don’t despair — many people combine several professions, especially when it comes to creativity, which earn very difficult. So you can safely day to work as a lawyer, and in the evening to paint and in some point of your painting will be enough to earn money.
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